Category: Football

Football

  • Dastardly Deviant David Sullivan’s Deserved Downfall Goes Dotty

    Dastardly Deviant David Sullivan’s Deserved Downfall Goes Dotty

    ‘Heretics’ interview by Andrew Gold with Matthew Steeples about sexual allegations against convicted criminal David Sullivan featuring scandalous stories about West Ham FC, Karren Brady and Ampika Pickston goes viral; watched over 207,000 times in just three days

    On Thursday evening an interview by Andrew Gold premiered on the Heretics YouTube channel at 6pm. By 9pm on Saturday evening, this 39-minute programme had been watched by well over 150,000 people and by Monday morning at 10am, it had attracted some 207,000 views; that’s more viewers than many a mainstream media show.

     

    Featuring the sordid and sleazy story of David Sullivan – the clearly not a ‘fit and proper person’ to be in charge of a football club at the very least given he hadn’t been allowed near women and youth games in years – this show delved into the history of a brash and brazen bullying billionaire whose tenure at both Birmingham FC and West Ham FC never ran smoothly.

     

    More importantly, Gold and Steeples delved into the recent allegations of sexual impropriety that Sullivan has been able to keep under the carpet for years and took a serious look at another pair of pantomime villains in this piece – David Sullivan’s gobby unfit-to-run-a-care-home wife-to-be Ampika Pickston and the David Cameron appointed to the House of Lords “associate of the dildo floggers” Karren Brady.

     

    Watch the 39-minute programme here; it certainly pulls no punches. Do you believe David Sullivan to be delusional and dreadful or do you think he’s fallen foul of what he labels “false allegations”?

     

    Follow Matthew Steeples on X at @M_Steeples and The Steeple Times at @SteepleTimes.

     

    Subscribe to our YouTube channel at @mjs2781 or become a member even.

     

    If you haven’t done so already, please support keeping The Steeple Times in the business of telling the stories that the mainstream media don’t dare touch by helping fund our work via Patreon. Even a small donation will help keep us going and will be hugely appreciated.

     

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    What a repugnant specimen – David Sullivan; a diminutive dwarf and convicted criminal (1982) and coffin dodger.
    What a repugnant specimen – David Sullivan; a diminutive dwarf and convicted criminal (1982) and coffin dodger.
    Karren Brady and Sir Philip Green
    Mouthy Poundland muckspreader Lady Brady with another of her deservedly loathed job destroying mates Sir Philip Green. Karren Brady has been associated with David Gold for at least four decades and also worked for Sir Philip at his company Arcadia. Birds of a rotten feather.
    Karren Brady has no place in the House of Lords. Shame on David Cameron for putting her there alongside the PPE profiteer Michelle Mone also. Disgraceful.
    Karren Brady has no place in the House of Lords. Shame on David Cameron for putting her there alongside the PPE profiteer Michelle Mone also. Disgraceful.
    Karren Brady and David Sullivan
    Brady with West Ham co-owner David Sullivan in 1993. Mr Sullivan was mocked by fans in September 2017 when they bounced a giant inflatable sex toy around a stadium during a game against Huddersfield.
    West-Ham-dildo-David-Sullivan
    The aforementioned inflatable.
    Ampika Pickston
    Mouthy menace Ampika Pickston was declared by Ofsted to “not have the skills and experience to run” AP Care Homes in 2023; she no doubt took to a bathtub and drank her stupid self silly.

    In his own words… Self-declared “King of Porn” David Sullivan on…

    His diminutive stature…

    “I’m short, so I have the ‘hightism’ thing against me, which hurts… I was born short. I wish I had been like Brad Pitt, but I am what I am. I may not be black, I may not be Jewish, but I’m little… Perhaps I would prefer to be a black Jewish man than a small white man. So, I get ‘hightism’ remarks against me. You’ve just got to take it on the chin. It’s not very nice.”

     

    His claim that he’s a “moral man” during an interview in 2000…

    “We all live our lives by our own standards and what we believe to be right and what we believe to be wrong and by my rules, I lead my life. I’ve never taken a drug in my life, I’ve never smoked a cigarette in my life… Erm, it’s pretty unusual in this day and age… I don’t think what I do is particularly bad.”

     

    The type of women he ‘goes for’…

    “I like ginger women, actually. I like redheads.”

     

    Sexual assault allegations against him…

    “After a lifetime spent building businesses in the adult industry in which I have met thousands of women, it is sadly inevitable that a small number of improper conduct claims are being made against me.”

     

    A 1989 newspaper interview, when asked about his sexual desires…

    “I can have up to three a day but some days I don’t have any – it depends how I feel and what else is happening… I have a desire to make love to most women.”

     

    What he got ‘upto’ with women…

    “What’s the point of owning a sweet shop if you can’t eat a few sweets?”

     

    Responding to claims in 2008 that he sexually assaulted a 25-year-old at his Essex mansion…

    “I’m a rich person so I’m a target for this sort of thing. That is the world we live in.”

     

    Being a pornographer…

    “I’ve made a lot of people happy. If I was an arms manufacturer or a cigarette manufacturer, and my products killed millions of my clients, I’d have a bit of doubt about the whole thing. I was a freedom fighter. I believe in the right of adults to make their own decisions.”

     

    What was in his smutty books, newspapers and magazines…

    “We feature fantasy and fun… We feature ladies in glamorous situations looking their best… All our stories, our books, are really the adult equivalent of comics that for the average factory worker in Wigan or the unemployed non-worker in Liverpool, they actually get a lot of fun out of reading our books and I think we do no harm whatsoever. We just put a bit of fun into peoples’ lives.”

     

    His desire to leave the porn business after his 1982 criminal conviction for living off immoral earnings…

    “I’d like to get out personally purely because I’ve done it for eleven years and in life if you do anything for eleven years, you feel like a change.”

     

    Why he was going to sell his shares in Birmingham FC in 2007…

    “I think deep down the public have had enough of us… Everybody says I should call it a day and ‘What do you need all that grief for?’”

     

    His ownership of West Ham in a 2017 interview with The Guardian

    “I feel like I haven’t done well enough. Nobody’s done well enough. I work my socks off but sometimes it’s not good enough.”

     

    The woman he made managing director of Birmingham FC aged just 23 and then had working with him for four decades in football…

    “Karren is a good businesswoman but she doesn’t understand football.”

     

    Giving a loan of £1 million to “crime boss” David Hunt to aid a libel action against The Sunday Times

    “[Just a] normal commercial transaction.”

     

    Of the style of business of him and cronies during a 2017 interview with The Guardian

     “I think we’re the most honest, open people you’ll ever deal with… We’re not liars.”

     

    Football agents and negotiating with them…

    “Giving in to terrorists or kidnappers. If you pay the ransom, they will only come back for more.”

     

    His crony Karren Brady having a column in The Sun

    “If I stop her doing it, the club would have to give her the money. And it’s a substantial amount of money, so I prefer for her to do it and the club not to give her the money… I’m confident Karren will write anything detrimental.”

     

    His clearly delusional self:

    “I am a private man, and those who personally and professionally know the real David Sullivan, not the caricature invented by the tabloids, know exactly who I am and what I stand for. I am absolutely not the person the media has decided to paint me as.”

     

    In her own words… “Overpainted Aunt Sally” Karren Brady on…

    Her destroyer of jobs and the high street mate ‘Sir Shifty’ Philip Green

    “The most dynamic, the most energetic, the most relentless business-person I have ever come across, a whirlwind of energy and ideas.”

     

    The nearly as controversial businessman Mike Ashley…

    “I feel sorry for a guy like Mike Ashley… He tried his best… I feel tremendous sympathy for Ashley.”

     

    Her “precarious work-life balance”…

    “[It’s a] balancing act… [I feel] constant guilt over being a working mother.”

     

    “I live day by day. There’s no other way.”

     

    “Dead end jobs” (that she certainly wouldn’t herself consider taking)…

    “No one wants a dead end job, but at least it’s a start.”

     

    Sexism…

    “I always laugh I read about sexism cases in the newspaper.”

     

    “It’s rubbish to say you can’t be proper friends with the opposite sex.”

     

    Her own mistakes…

    “My greatest mistake? I once took a three-day maternity leave.”

     

    Religion…

    “I am a faithful companion of Jesus.”

     

    Contradicting herself in spite of taking up a position in David Cameron’s government as Small Business Ambassador…

    “I have no interest in politics.”

     

    Her being investigated in connection with corruption in football

    “I was in a very dark place… It was gut-wrenching… I didn’t want to have to justify myself to people.”

     

    The East End of London…

    “A hotbed of racism.”

     

    Meeting the general public…

    “I have met people in the street who say: ‘You look like Karren Brady, but she is fat.’ But I don’t care.”

     

    Her nickname at school…

    “I was called ‘Fried Eggs’ and all that at school. Size does matter.”

     

    Eating cheese…

    “I’m a hard cheese person and I could have it with biscuits for breakfast, lunch and dinner.”

     

    Condoms in the Birmingham City boardroom…

    “I found [a condom] floating in the toilet… And it became this big whodunit. I mean, in the boardroom toilet of all places.”

     

    Her “wickedly indiscreet newspaper column”…

    “It’s what I leave out that would make your hair curl.”

     

    A desire to look like Sarah, Duchess of York…

    “Deep in my soul, I’m secretly a redhead.”

     

    Her dream man…

    “I prefer my men slightly overweight. Having said that, my ultimate dream man is Jimmy Nail and he’s skinny.”

     

    Comedian David Walliams…

    “Someone needs to tell him to calm down… Creepy.”

     

    Unsurprisingly getting abuse given her own vile tongue…

    “The abuse I get is vile. And so much worse now than it’s ever been.”

     

    Herself

    “At 23, I had skin as thick as a rhino… I don’t have any fears.”

     

    “I dare to put my head above the parapet, to have a mind and a voice of my own and to plough my own furrow.”

     

    “[I am now] one of the most highly sought-after motivational speakers in the world.”

     

    “I look like a demented Rapunzel.”

     

    More modest than the late Mother Theresa, one is simply left asking: “What on earth was it about the very wealthy woman Karren Brady that David Cameron saw fit to elevate her to the House of Lords?”

     

  • Five Unlikely Things Famous Footballers Did Next…

    Five Unlikely Things Famous Footballers Did Next…

    David Lennox shares the little-known stories of what five famous footballers did next after retiring their pitch time prowess – amongst them everything from novel writing to forensic detective work

    Top flight footballers often enjoy all kinds of bonuses – casa pariurilor bonus – after retiring their boots for a final time. Some end up owning bars and restaurants whilst many go down the career of becoming club managers.

     

    Here we tell the tales of five of the more unlikely subsequent career paths taken by the famous faces of ‘the beautiful game’:

     

    Eric Cantona

    Eric Cantona

    Man United legend Eric Cantona was described as an “enigmatic Frenchman” who was “one of the Premier League’s most controversial players ever” on induction to the English Football Hall of Fame in 2002.

     

    Since retiring from the pitch, Cantona has become an actor – playing opposite Cate Blanchett and Sir John Gielgud in the 1998 film Elizabeth, in Looking for Eric in 2010 and as ‘The Stallion’ in the 2014 film You and the Night – but it is for his political protests and terrible temper that this twice married father of four is now more widely remembered.

     

    At a press conference related to a criminal charge of assault against him in 1995, Cantona bizarrely remarked: “When the seagulls follow the trawler, it’s because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea. Thank you very much.” He was later fined and suspended from the French national team and sentenced to 120 hours of community service.

     

    Sir Tom Finney CBE (1922 – 2014, AKA ‘The Preston Plumber’)

    Sir Tom Finney

    Widely considered one of the game’s greatest players, Sir Tom Finney had to wait until the age of 24 to make his professional debut for his hometown club, Preston North End, due to the disruption of the Second World War.

     

    Retiring after 433 Football League, 40 FA Cup appearances and scoring 210 goals for the team and playing 76 times and scoring 30 goals for England in 1960, Sir Tom subsequently ran a “highly successful” plumbing business in the north west of England well into the 1990s.

     

    Of him, fellow footballer and fellow businessman Dave Whelan later remarked: “He was and still is a total gentleman.” Tom Finney Plumbing Limited remains in business as of date.

     

    Michael Owen

    Michael Owen

    Liverpool, Real Madrid, Newcastle United, Manchester United and England striker Michael Owen morphed into an amateur jockey and came second on Calder Prince at Ascot in November 2017 in a charity race watched by the then Prince Charles. “I’m home in one piece and had the time of my life,” he commented and in the years since his involvement in the ‘Sport of Kings.’

     

    Owen currently owns many racehorses and had a winner at Royal Ascot in 2011 and another in the Dubai Gold Cup in 2015. He is also the founder of the Michael Owen Racing Club – a club that he describes as giving “leasing of an ownership interest… without the risk of the high ongoing cost of owning your own horse.”

     

    Terry Venables (AKA ‘El Tel’)

    Terry Venables

    Best known as England’s manager between 1994 and 1996, prior to that Dagenham, Essex born Terry Venables played as a midfielder for clubs including Chelsea, Tottenham Hotspur and Queens Park Rangers in the 1960s and 1970. He was once also even hired to promote a hairnet-cum-wig for women wearing curlers named a ‘Thingummywig.’

     

    In later years, this man of many talents went on to run a hotel in Penàguila in the Alicante region of Spain, but what Venables is less widely lauded for is having co-authored four novels with Gordon Williams under the joint pseudonym of P. B. Yuill. In due course the pair became co-creators of Hazell, a popular ITV detective series based on the books also. It counted the one-time girlfriend of Paul McCartney, Jane Asher, amongst its stars.

     

    Somewhat ironically given controversies from his time in management, Venables gave the fictional James Hazell lines that included introducing himself as “the biggest bastard who ever pushed your bell-button.” His amusingly “sharp one-liners” included: “I’ve got a wad of cash ‘ere that could choke a washing machine.”

     

    Arjan de Zeeuw

    Arjan de Zeeuw

    Dutch centre back Adrianus de Zeeuw played for British clubs including Barnsley, Wigan Athletic, Coventry City and Portsmouth between 1996 and 2008.

     

    In April 2014, he told BBC Sport: “I was looking at something else other than football… I thought I needed to look at the world a bit more, so I tried to get back into my medical studies and then bumped into this friend of mine who was a detective in Alkmaar [the Netherlands] where we are now.” By then he had become a forensic detective specialising in amongst other things murder and sex crimes and even joined his colleagues to play in the police force’s national team.

     

    De Zeeuw enthused: “I’m trying to make the world a better place, a more equal place… It’s challenging; like football, it’s a team effort.”

     

  • Are Arsenal FC Serious Title Challengers This Season?

    Are Arsenal FC Serious Title Challengers This Season?

    David Lennox suggests Arsenal have been getting the results since the start of the season, but questions if they are serious title challengers also

    Arsenal FC has had their best start to the top tier of men’s professional football in England in over 100 years. They are currently sitting at the top of the Premier League with 37 points after 14 games. Based on their current run of performances, are Arsenal genuine title challengers?

     

    Some football fans believe that Arsenal can go all the way and beat rivals such as Manchester City, Liverpool, and Chelsea, to win the league for the fourteenth time, whereas others believe they will not win the league and will more likely end up in a top-four spot instead.

     

    Can Arsenal really win the league?

    It’s still early days yet, but there’s a good chance that Arsenal could win the Premier league. The ‘Gunners’ have played 14, won 12, drawn 1, and lost just 1. They scored 33 and let in 11, and they currently have 34 points, which put them at the top of the table with another 24 games to go until the end of the season.

     

    To understand how likely it is that Arsenal can win the league, the best thing to do would be to look to some of the major sports betting sites to see what kind of odds they are currently offering for Arsenal to win outright.

     

    What are the current odds of Arsenal winning the Premier League?

    At many of today’s most trusted online sports betting sites, Arsenal FC are currently the second odds-on favourite team to win the 2022/23 Premier League campaign. At the time of writing, they are priced at +500 in American/Moneyline odds, which equates to 5/1 in UK fractional odds, and 6.00 in European decimal odds.

     

    In comparison, the odds-on favourites to win the league are Manchester City, who are currently priced at -335 (which is 3/10, or 1.30). Don’t forget that you can get tickets to watch Arsenal and Manchester City, or any other Premier League team, right now. All you have to do is click here for the latest ticket prices and availability.

     

    Recent results and upcoming fixtures

    Arsenal beat Brentford 3-0 away on September 18th before beating local rivals Tottenham 3-1 at home on October 1st. Their next game was a Europa League group stage match at home to FK Bodø Glimt, which the Gunners won 3-0.

     

    When they returned for Premier League action, they beat Liverpool 3-2 at home. Their next game saw them beat FK Bodø/Glimt 1-0 away from home before going on to beat Leeds United 1-0 at home in the Premier League, which saw them go to the top of the league.

     

    Following that victory at Elland Road, they won all their Europa League games and secured three victories in the Premier League. The most notable being a 1-0 win away to Chelsea, further cementing The Gunners’ position as a top-6 beater, despite the disappointing result (not performance) against Manchester United.

     

    Their 1-1 draw with Southampton was the only blip during this period but, in a season otherwise going as perfect as possible, the Arsenal faithful will surely have already forgiven them, instead praying that their performances can continue once the World Cup in Qatar concludes and all their players come back healthy.

     

    Photo Credits – Photo by Who’s Denilo ?, Braden Hopkins, Pedro Bariak and Nelson Ndongala on Unsplash.

     

    The Emirates Stadium was completed in 2006 and has a current seating capacity of 60,704 – making it the fifth largest football stadium in England by capacity.
    Amongst the famous faces to have played for the club are and Cesc Fàbregas and Sol Campbell.
    Emirates bought the naming rights for the stadium in 2004 in a 15-year deal estimated at £100 million that also included an initial 7-year shirt sponsorship that started in 2006.
  • Moron of the Moment 2022 – Richard Madeley Insults A Lioness

    Moron of the Moment 2022 – Richard Madeley Insults A Lioness

    As TV twerp and alleged tealeaf Richard Madeley patronises a member of the England ‘Lionesses,’ we call on GMB to fire this utterly reprehensible ratbag

    Richard Madeley is certainly one thing and that’s reliable. This alleged shoplifter of champagne who brags about not wearing underpants is reliable at being offensive and he’s reliable at thinking his own cringeworthy gaffes amusing.

     

    Madeley is reliable at being annoying and like the fictional character he bases himself upon, Alan Partridge, he’s someone who doesn’t realise that people are laughing at him and not with him. Here is a berk of the first order and here is a prized prat who this morning decided to insult one of England’s winning ‘lionesses,’ a lady named Chloe Kelly.

     

    ‘Lioness’ Kelly – who scored the winning goal against Germany on Saturday night – appeared on Good Morning Britain this morning and instead of being lauded by Madeley was left “perplexed” after he called her “Coco” because “that’s what [he] calls [his] daughter, Chloe.”

     

    Though called out by viewers quite rightly as “creepy” and told to “show some respect” to the now legendary ‘Lioness,’ Britain’s worst television interviewer failed to make any form of apology and simply droned on: “Right, er, now it’s competition time. We’ve got another one.”

     

    Pictured top – The most cringeworthy and creepy presenter on British television (left) with his boozed-off-her-brain wife and the legendary ‘Lioness’ Chloe Kelly (right). This winning goal scorer did well not to get up and lamp Judy Finnigan’s feckless fool of a husband.

     

    Judy Finnigan and Richard Madeley mess drunk wreck car crash
    Judy Finnigan is simply well-known for getting herself a little beyond over-refreshed and flashing her cleavage whilst her ‘Dorian Gray-like’ husband is simply well-known for being accused of helping himself to champagne in supermarkets and making an utter berk of his never-sorry-self.

    Responses To Richard Madeley ‘Coco’ Gaffe With Lioness Chloe Kelly

    https://twitter.com/nickoverheard/status/1554372512288575488
    This morning on Twitter, a man named Nick @NickOverheard shared his thoughts on Madeley calling a ‘Lioness’ named Chloe Kelly who he’d clearly never met before Coco. Nick observed: “Could Richard Madeley be any more Alan Partridge if he tried?! 🙈 #gmb.”
    Tweet 1
    Tweet 2

    ‘King of Cringe’ Richard Madeley’s ‘Finest’ Moments

    Many of these have done the rounds before, but mixed in are some new and especially outrageous examples:

     

    On his son’s wedding

    “There’s been so much angst about it… It’s been so choppy, but, yes, he got married and now we’ve got a daughter-in-law.”

     

    Of his daughter

    “Sorry Chloe, but you were an accident and you know it!”

     

    To a member of the victorious England 2022 ‘Lioness’ team named Chloe Kelly

    “Chloe or Coco, as I call my daughter, Coco, thank you very much. Thanks for coming in. Right, er, now it’s competition time. We’ve got another one.”

     

    To a male weatherman of his daughter

    “My daughter fancies you by the way.”

     

    In conversation with President Clinton

    “I know what it’s like to be wronged by the press. I was once accused of shoplifting. Unlike you though, I knew I was innocent.”

     

    Of daubing himself in fake tan and turning a “shade of mahogany”

    “What happened was at three in the morning I put my daughter’s fake tan on, I was doing a Donald Trump.”

     

    On going commando

    “I don’t wear underwear… 30 per cent of blokes don’t wear underwear, it’s not mad.”

     

    Whilst on the lavatory squatting

    “You are not filming me urinating. You can listen.”

     

    To an actor who was playing a bisexual

    “Would you prefer to have sex with me or Judy?”

     

    Of his and Judy Finnigan’s sexual activities

    “When we were trying to conceive, I would douse my balls in icy water before intercourse.”

     

    “Remember when you had thrush, Judy? You had a terrible time of it.”

     

    On Viagra

    “It makes everything much longer and return, you know, swiftly.”

     

    Of sex on television

    “I don’t think what we see on television is erotic enough.”

     

    Of women

    “I’ve never met a single woman who’s happy with the way she looks, except Jordan, although I’ve never met her.”

     

    “Women lie about sex. It doesn’t matter how many partners she says she’s had before you… She’s lying.”

     

    Of alleged mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell

    “The sharks are circling; they smell blood in the water… Cynics would say the [FBI] agency is playing a long game, seeking to sway the minds of jurors in advance of Maxwell’s trial next year… Innocent until proven guilty? That honourable credo is in shreds.”

     

    “Firstly, consider the conditions under which Ms Maxwell is being held. They are truly grim… It would take a heart of stone not to feel empathy for another human being suffering what amounts to mental torture. To coin a phrase: you wouldn’t treat a dog like that.”

     

    “But it’s not sadism, or premature punishment ahead of a verdict. No; there’s calculated purpose behind this pitiless regime. But, here’s another prediction… it will. They’re trying to break her.”

     

    On elephants

    “So, are you telling me elephants are not born evil?”

     

    After a woman remortgaged her house to fund treatment for her dog

    “Is there a point where you just say: ‘Too expensive, the dog has to die?’”

     

    To a man crying after paramedics saved his life

    “Stop crying! This is supposed to make you happy! Anyway, after the break, the biggest dog in the UK. And he really is big. Don’t miss it!”

     

    Showing sympathy for people who died in quicksand in Morecambe Bay

    “Yes, what an awful way to die.”

     

    On assisted suicide

    “At that point where you just need a little push to go over the edge, I wouldn’t give a two-penny f**k if there was a risk of being prosecuted.”

     

    In Nostradamus-like fashion on coronavirus and lockdowns

    “We are being duped… [They are trying to] put the fear of God into the public. A great reckoning is coming.”

     

    “There’s no point in running away and hiding from the virus.”

     

    “We must learn to live with coronavirus.”

     

    “If I had a bell, I would ring it… Only 59 people who have been double vaccinated and without any other serious underlying health problems, died from COVID, out of 50,000 deaths in England, this year.”

     

    “I have to say that the majority of people are surprisingly forgiving [to government representative Steve Barclay], and are actually saying that they understand that the reason for some of the mistakes wasn’t malpractice but scientific ignorance – we didn’t know enough… But on the whole, you seem to be getting away with it – as far as our viewers are concerned.”

     

    Of catarrh

    “With men when we get all the catarrh we have it up, like Leo on Titanic… Judy swallows her phlegm.”

     

    Of old women skipping

    “There’s not many better things than seeing an older woman skipping.”

     

    Of wanting to be black

    “I hope when I’m reincarnated I come back black because you age better.”

     

    To actress Keira Knightley

    “Can we get some make up please, get Keira looking like a crack whore, she’d make a good crack whore.”

     

    To singer Sophie Ellis-Bextor

    “Where did you get your face?”

     

    To mindreader Derren Brown

    “Can we have petroleum   and a rope? We are   burning you at the end of the show.”

     

    To Sex Pistols singer-songwriter John Lydon

    “If we could throw a fishing rod into the corridors of time and reel you in, you’d throttle you wouldn’t you?”

     

    To gay Pet Shop Boys singer Neil Tennant

    “How’s your wife?”

     

    To a novelist

    “If you were going to write an autobiography, who would it be about?”

     

    Of troubled footballer Paul Gascoigne

    “He suffers for us. He bears our pain in the most public way possible… Perhaps this has always been Paul Gasgoine’s destiny.”

     

    To a psychiatric patient

    “So, Jane, when did you first realise you were quite clearly mad?”

     

    To a group of dwarves

    “Do you find that people patronise you? That means that they talk down to you?”

     

    Of an autistic teenager

    “The thing with Daniel [Wakeford, a ‘star’ on Channel 4’s Undateables] is, he has autism but is very intelligent and as we can see extremely talented. Has Daniel always been autistic?”

     

    To an anorexic teenager

    “Five stone? Wow, that’s concentration camp thin, that is.”

     

    To a caller

    “I understand you have a little lad of 12. Is it a boy or a girl?”

     

    And finally and most insensitively, to a young child with leukemia

    “Hello baldy.”

     

    Ghislaine-Maxwell-2
    In April 2021, we revealed that the one-time classmate of ‘Spreadsheet Phil,’ the former Tory chancellor Philip Hammond, Richard Madeley was being followed by Ghislaine Maxwell’s PR team on Twitter and that he’d written two columns in the ‘Daily Express’ in which he expressed “empathy” for the now convicted mucky madam sex offender. The presenter has yet to make his views known on what he feels about Maxwell’s multiple victims and her much deserved 20-year jail sentence.
    Drunk
    Richard Madeley and Judy Finnigan are often pictured out boozing. Often, ‘Mummy Finnigan’ finds herself looking a little beyond pissed.
    The presenter once dressed up as Ali G to present ‘This Morning.’ It was later voted “one of the worst moments in television history.”
    Alan-Partridge
    Richard Madeley is also often compared to the inept comedy character broadcaster Alan Partridge. They not only look alike, but also are equally incompetent and tactless. Twitter users regularly condemn Romford, Essex born Madeley as “daft” and as a “pompous prat.”
    Diana-Princess-of-Wales
    In July 2021, the ‘Dorian Gray of Daytime Telly’ was mocked for being a lookalike of the person portrayed in the quite tasteless Diana, Princess of Wales statue. At the time, the all-round berk was also lambasted after claiming he “suffered from PTSD after his son’s wedding.”
    Ched-Evans
    ‘Mummy-like’ Judy Finnigan’s decision to defend footballer Ched Evans – jailed for 5 years in 2012 for allegedly raping a 19-year-old – on ‘Loose Women’ in October 2014 shocked the nation. Responding at the time, Katie Russell, of Rape Crisis England and Wales remarked: “Judy Finnigan’s comments are really unfortunate and could potentially cause some hurt and distress to the many survivors of sexual violence who will inevitably have been watching ‘Loose Women’ and who will read and hear her views reported.” Frankly, though she’s thankfully somewhat retreated from our screens in recent years, here is a woman best known for boozing, flashing her boobs and falling off sofas who is just as bad as her horrific husband.
    https://twitter.com/MarieAnnUK/status/1437702277226172416?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1437702277226172416%7Ctwgr%5E078ccec006b6f2ddcd9b33dca163cc66de11a704%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thesteepletimes.com%2Fmovers-shakers%2Frichard-madeley-2022%2F
    In another Alan Partridge-esque moment in September 2021, Judy Finnigan’s husband Richard Madeley banged on about the dangers of quicksand. Naturally, he had to make personal reference and claimed: “It got me once… More of that later.”
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcx3FUarNiI&feature=emb_imp_woyt
    Whilst ‘Dorian Gray-esque’ Richard Madeley is best known for helping himself to champagne in supermarkets, his wife Judy Finnigan will be forever remembered for flashing at an awards ceremony in 2000.
  • A £3m Wagatha Win – Coleen Rooney Trounces Rebekah Vardy

    A £3m Wagatha Win – Coleen Rooney Trounces Rebekah Vardy

    Matthew Steeples suggests that cool-and-collected Coleen Rooney very much deserved her victory over the mendacious minx Rebekah Vardy; the lesson from the ‘Wagatha Christie’ case is not to take legal action when you know you’ve told porky pies

    After judgment was issued in the ‘Wagatha Christie’ case, Rebekah Vardy yesterday was shown to be nothing but a liar. She brought a case that was neither necessary or rationally thought out and in doing so has simply elevated the defendant Coleen Rooney from someone the public laughed at to someone they now respect.

     

    Like Amber Heard in both her British and American cases, Carrie Johnson fan Mrs Vardy has thrown her very own reputation under the bus and will now go down in history as nothing but a stupid, mendacious woman. Her opponent, Mrs Rooney, will now rise and rise and in showing dignity in her response to the verdict proves herself to be the far bigger person.

     

    Speaking on Radio 4’s Today programme this morning, Coleen Rooney’s Liverpool based lawyer Paul Lunt, a partner and head of litigation at a firm named Brabners, analysed the success he achieved for his client and began:

     

    “Coleen had been given my name by somebody and I received an approach. I was given some background details. I was asked for an opinion. I gave my view. I obviously won’t go into what that was. It went from there and she was happy to instruct me and we got on with it.”

     

    Asked why Rooney couldn’t settle at the beginning, Lunt continued:

     

    “That’s a really good question. This is something that has really irked Coleen and me to an extent throughout. As she has said very publicly, this is a case that she never wanted to have. She never wanted this to go to a trial and we did try hard to settle it.”

     

    “The public commentary, the newspaper coverage, the media commentary and a lot of the comments that you’ll see from the general public have often said: ‘Why don’t these two just sort it out?’ and that can be very frustrating because it takes two people to sort things out.”

     

    “And Coleen, and what people often miss in this case and in the commentary is that she is the defendant. She didn’t start the case, she didn’t choose to have it and it was commenced by Becky Vardy.”

     

    “And when you are a defendant in a case, you have really only got very limited choices. You can either defend or you can capitulate and Coleen was not for capitulating, but we did make every effort to see if there was some middle ground that could be found and sadly we didn’t manage to succeed on that front.”

     

    Asked if Rooney considered a financial settlement with Vardy prior to trial, the lawyer responded:

     

    “Well, look I’m not going to go into discussions we had. They were all confidential. Many of them are subject to strict confidentiality arrangements so I can’t discuss them and it would be quite wrong when there are still certain live issues in relation to the case to be getting into that, but, you know, for our part, from our perspective, we had a very open mind in relation to the discussions that we had and we were just trying to find a sensible alternative to going all the way to a trial.”

     

    Questioned as to “what is still to be determined,” Lunt observed:

     

    “Well what’s come out is the judgment on the facts and the rulings on the law as it were. There are what are called consequentials to be dealt with and that will be a separate hearing some time later on in the summer or autumn. But, the issues such as the payment of legal fees, costs and one or two other consequential matters to do with the involvement of journalists and The Sun and other people who were caught up in the wash along the way.”

     

    After the supposed £3 million costs were mentioned by the presenter, Lunt suggested this to be off-the-scale exaggeration and shared:

     

    “Well, I mean the costs budget and these days in High Court litigation, I mean everyone has to produce cost budgets which are public record and so the court had to look at the budgeting, as it does with most High Court litigation these days very early on.”

     

    “The figures there are a matter of record. £3 million is a gross overestimate and doesn’t represent those figures.”

     

    “I can’t speak for what Mrs Rooney has spent on the case and I can only know what I know from my side of things, but I do think that there has been an awful lot of over exaggeration in the media commentary about what those costs are.”

     

    Turning to whether Rooney might next pursue The Sun and other players, the lawyer offered:

     

    “Well, it’s not so much for Mrs Rooney to pursue anything, but The Sun were, or a number of Sun journalists were thought to be brought into the claim by Mrs Vardy in relation to witness evidence and there are certain consequential issues in relation to how that played out that will be between The Sun and Mrs Vardy to resolve.”

     

    “It’s only in relation to the fact that there was an attempt to call various The Sun journalists. It is referred to in the judgment – the witness summons that were issued.”

     

    “The judge, in fact, found that the witness summons were issued essentially improperly in relation to the content of the witness summonses and there may be consequences that flow from that, but, as I say, that’s a matter for The Sun to take up with Mrs Vardy and for the judge to make a determination on.”

     

    “Coleen hasn’t wanted this. She didn’t want any of this to happen. She doesn’t want any compensation, retribution. She’s never wanted any of that. She just wanted the intrusion that she was seeing into her private life to stop and that was her sole aim and her sole focus.”

     

    “She has no remaining objectives. Certainly, she doesn’t have any need for compensation or demands or anything of that nature. She’s just glad that it’s over and that she can get on with her life.”

     

    “We’ve certainly had lots of cameras and paparazzis following us around and I’ve had loads of approaches from all sorts of areas of the media and, you know, if they’re all telling me the truth then there are a lot of documentaries being made. I’ve certainly not engaged with any of them and it would be news to me if Coleen has engaged with any of them.

     

    Following up and contacting The Steeple Times by email, football historian and author of WAG WARS: The Glamour History of Footballers’ Wives Sam Kimberley concluded that “Wags won’t have the same media weight from now on” after this “last hurrah of Waggery.” He told us:

     

    “The eye-watering cost of suing over Rooney’s tweet has set Vardy back £3 million. It shows a high tide in Waggery. Before they waged a war of fashion brands and midriffs, but it is a sign of football coming of age that Wags now wage a war of words and daggers are drawn in court.”

     

    “We will unlikely ever go back to how it was. It is hard to see how any wag can top this, if they ever wanted to. The new Wags seem a lot more serious than their predecessors. It is a worthy end of an era.”

     

    The Victors – The Rooneys have come out of this case on top. They didn’t choose to bring it and they showed that the claimant was nothing but a troublemaking liar.
    The Losers – It is likely now that the vexatious Vardy family will now have to sell their Portuguese holiday home to cover the costs of their utterly pointless legal action.
    Paul Lunt Brabners
    The Lawyer – Paul Lunt of Brabners will now be noted in history for his win for ‘Wagatha Christie’ Coleen Rooney.
    Sam Kimberley’s 288-page history of Wags in Britain from 1964 onwards was published by Gibson Square Books earlier this month. The book features the stories of amongst others Victoria Beckham, Angie Best, Cheryl Cole, Nancy Dell’Olio, Ulrika Johnson and Tina Moore.
  • Vardy Carrie’s On – Rebekah Vardy Joins #TeamCarrieJohnson

    Vardy Carrie’s On – Rebekah Vardy Joins #TeamCarrieJohnson

    Birdbrained blubber Rebekah Vardy comes out in support of vicious vixen Carrie Johnson; time for a night of Lambrusco, footie and ABBA in Downing Street?

    In the completely wasteful ‘Wagatha Christie’ defamation case, Rebekah Vardy succeeded in scoring many an own goal and now it seems this hapless harridan has kicked herself further into the quagmire in returning to social media to offer up compliments the Prime Minister’s pugnacious puppet mistress, Carrie Johnson.

     

    Revealed yesterday by The Spectator’s ‘Steerpike,’ the wife of the lump of lard Leicester striker that is Jamie Vardy responded to an Instagram post by the blithering buffoon Boris Johnson’s wife that featured an image of her and her current husband leaving the Jubilee Service of Thanksgiving last weekend at St Paul’s Cathedral.

     

    Curiously, though the post made no mention of the boos and jeers the couple deservedly received, Coleen Rooney’s rival thought it appropriate to respond and remark: “You look stunning Carrie.” She followed with a heart emoji and “xx” kisses.

     

    Of this ‘Steerpike’ tellingly observed: “It seems that Carrie’s Labour red outfit won her one fan at least… It’s good to see that the controversies of the past haven’t blunted Vardy’s Insta game. Wags of a feather stick together.”

     

    Perhaps the former Miss Symonds might now return the compliment with an invite to her Lulu Lytle clad apartment in Downing Street. Chuck in “the gays” – as she supposedly likes to call her sidekicks that number Henry Newman and Josh Grimstone – and fire up the ABBA and it’ll be time for ‘Partygate Mark II.’ A WAG, after all, can certainly bring plenty of zesty Lambrusco Bianco to get the bash balling-up.

     

    Pictured top – Both women like to wear hats that make them look quite beyond stupid; that Mrs Vardy (left) likes to wear ones that sport messages such as “you can’t handle the truth” to provoke her rival Mrs Rooney speaks volumes as to the nature of her true character.

     

    Instagram
    One would have thought the leading WAG might have decided to take a break from social media after a trial that – win or lose – will cost her and her husband millions. Instead, the Leicester city striker’s wayward wife came out in support of #TeamCarrieJohnson during the Jubilee festivities on Instagram.
    As the Prime Minister and his wife arrived at and left last Friday’s Jubilee Service of Thanksgiving event, they were met with jeering. It illustrated how hated they truly are and it is most certainly indication that it is time for them to go. With polls predicting a “very heavy loss” in the Wakefield by-election to Labour and a loss also to the Liberal Democrats in Tiverton, perhaps his spouse might persuade Rebekah Vardy to join them on the campaign trail. It’d certainly be yet another own goal given just 3% of respondents to a poll by ‘The Steeple Times’ thought the Leicester City striker’s wife was the person coming out best in the ‘Wagatha Christie’ libel case.
    43% of respondents to our poll in May believed Coleen Rooney to be coming out of the libel case best whilst 49% thought it was the judge in the matter, The Hon. Mrs Justice Steyn, who had triumphed. The agitator in the matter, however, was clearly the one seen to have done worst by allowing this matter to escalate as far as it has.
    Henry Newman Josh Grimstone
    Henry Newman (left) and Josh Grimstone (right), the PM’s wife’s besties, could be brought in to help get any party started. The former is known for his love of ABBA and the latter could even persuade their dear mate Michael Gove to join in also.
    Wagatha Christe trial
    Coleen Rooney (left) would most definitely not make the guest list of any party attended by Mrs Vardy (right), however.
  • Tangerines Triumph – Blackpool Beats Off Owen Oyston Woes

    Tangerines Triumph – Blackpool Beats Off Owen Oyston Woes

    Just as Blackpool Football Club’s new 17-year-old star signing Jake Daniels is widely lauded after “coming out” as gay, controversial former owner Owen Oyston unsurprisingly fails in laughable £78 million claim against the receivers of the ‘Tangerine’ team

    They’re so used to bad news at Blackpool Football Club that the beyond positive reaction to their new ‘star’ coming out as gay must have come as a total shock to any ‘Sandgrown’un’ who considers themselves a ‘Tangerine’ or ‘Seasider.’

     

    Occuring just a couple of weeks after flamboyant fedora hat sporting “miner to millionaire” Owen Oyston failed in his “brazen” bid to claim £78 million ($97.3 million, €92.8 million or درهم357.2 million) from receivers of the club he formerly owned, Bispham, Lancashire born forward Jake Daniels’ decision to “come out” was praised by everyone from Prime Minister Boris Johnson to fellow footballer Harry Kane.

     

    Jake Daniels Blackpool Football Club gay
    Out and Proud – Jake Daniels – born 8th January 2005 – has now become the UK’s only male professional footballer to be “publicly out” at this time.

    Reporting on the “desperate attempt” – that saw the club valued at a ludicrous grand total of £86.2 million ($107.5 million, €102.6 million or درهم394.7 million) – by the 88-year-old, The Blackpool Gazette stated that Oyston “believed the assets [which included the club, the stadium and its training ground] ought to have been broken up and sold separately.”

     

    Going further, the former Crown Court actor – who was jailed for 6 years in 1996 and served a sentence 3 years and 6 months for the rape and indecent assault of a 16-year-old girl – “made a serious allegation of negligence, claiming the receivers had ‘breached their duty through the sale of assets of Denaxe, the company formerly known as Segesta that owned the majority of shares in the football club and its related assets.”

     

    This suggestion fell on death ears and of the attempt, judge Mr Justice Fancourt concluded that there was “no realistic prospect of the claim succeeding,” with The Blackpool Gazette adding: “It’s understood Oyston has already spent over £1 million ($1.2 million, €1.2 million or درهم4.6 million) in failed litigation since the sale of the club.”

     

    Meanwhile, whilst 17-year-old Jake Daniels was saluted by an eclectic array of names – including the Reverend Richard Coles, Ed Davey MP, Nadine Dorries MP, Rio Ferdinand, Eddie Izzard, Boris Johnson MP, Gary Lineker, Angela Rayner MP, Sir Keir Starmer MP and Tánaiste Leo Varadkar – Oyston has still not managed to offload his Georgian mansion near Lancaster.

     

    Grade II* listed Quernmore Park Hall – featured in The Steeple Times along with its especially gauche-gaudy, gold-clad fittings in March – remains on offer for rent for the completely bonkers pie-in-the-sky sum of £40,000 ($49,900, €47,600 or درهم183,200 per month).

     

    The Louche Life of Owen Oyston – Owner of Blackpool Football Club from 1988 until 2019

    Stuart-Hall-William-Roache-Owen-Oyston
    Convicted paedophile Stuart Hall with ‘Coronation Street’ actor William Roache (nicknamed ‘Cock Roache’ for boasting about having slept with over 1,000 women and being involved in bizarre Druid rituals), convicted rapist Owen Oyston and four women. The three men were all, for a time, directors of Oystons Estate Agency – a firm that ceased to exist circa August 2019.
    Quernmore Park Hall gaudy gauche gold tacky
    The County Durham born tycoon’s Quernmore Park Hall, Quernmore, Lancaster, LA2 9HN, United Kingdom remains on offer for rent for the staggering and frankly ridiculous sum of £40,000 per month in spite of it having décor that would only appeal to Hyacinth Bucket or the cast of ‘Dynasty.’
    Max-Clifford-Stuart-Hall-William-Roache-Owen-Oyston
    The thankfully since croaked paedophile Max Clifford was the PR for Owen Oyston for a time. In 1997, after being hired to represent him prior to the latter’s jailing, creepy Clifford remarked: “[Owen] Oyston is many things, including very arrogant, but he is not a rapist.”
    Valeri-Belokon-Owen-Oyston
    In May 2018, during a court case between Owen Oyston and Valeri Belokon, the former was branded “vindictive,” “nasty” and someone who was now “hell bent on making life as bloody as possible for his wife” according to ‘The Blackpool Gazette.’ The paper added: “Mr Oyston owes £24 million to Valeri Belokon to buy back his shares in the club after Justice Marcus Smith ruled last year that Mr Oyston had ‘illegitimately stripped’ Blackpool FC of assets after it was promoted to the Premier League in 2010. It was found that the Oystons had unfairly prejudiced the Latvian, who accused them of ‘improperly’ extracting tens of millions of pounds from the club.”
    Vicki-Oyston
    Whilst her husband was in jail between 1996 and 1999, Vicki Oyston (neé Burns) – who was married from 1964 to 1982 first and then again for a second time from 1988 (she again sought a divorce in 2018, it is unknown as to whether this has been granted) to now 88-year-old Owen John Oyston – ran Blackpool Football Club. In 2014, ‘The Sunday Times’ listed the family as being worth £100 million.
    Karl-Oyston-Owen-Oyston
    Subsequently, one of the couple’s children, Karl Oyston (pictured front left), became chairman of Blackpool Football Club in 1999. He served in that role until 2018, but was loathed and detested by fans. The family owned the club from May 1988 to until February 2019 when the High Court appointed receivers and removed Owen Oyston and his daughter, Natalie Christopher, from the board.
    Blackpool-Football-Club
    The hatred of Blackpool F.C. fans for the Oyston family became so intense that there were protests against them. The club was eventually acquired out of receivership in 2019 when locally born hedge fund owner Simon Sadler purchased a 96.2% share in the club. In 2021, the Segantii Capital founder commented: “Two years in, and I’m still full of awe and wonder at being the owner of my hometown football club. I know that it’s a great honour and privilege to be the custodian of Blackpool Football Club, and I will continue to do my bit to protect, cherish and nurture it for the future generations of fans to come.”

    Statement from Jake Daniels

    This season has been a fantastic one for me on the pitch. I’ve made my first-team debut, scored 30 goals for the youth team, signed my first professional contract and shared success with my team-mates, going on a great run in the FA Youth Cup and lifting the Lancashire FA Pro-Youth Cup.

     

    But off the pitch I’ve been hiding the real me and who I really am. I’ve known my whole life that I’m gay, and I now feel that I’m ready to come out and be myself.

     

    It’s a step into the unknown being one of the first footballers in this country to reveal my sexuality, but I’ve been inspired by Josh Cavallo, Matt Morton and athletes from other sports, like Tom Daley, to have the courage and determination to drive change.       

     

    In reaching this point, I’ve had some of the best support and advice from my family, my Club, my agent and Stonewall, who have all been incredibly pro-active in putting my interests and welfare first. I have also confided in my team-mates in the youth team here at Blackpool, and they too have embraced the news and supported my decision to open up and tell people.  

     

    I’ve hated lying my whole life and feeling the need to change to fit in. I want to be a role model myself by doing this.

     

    There are people out there in the same space as me that may not feel comfortable revealing their sexuality. I just want to tell them that you don’t have to change who you are, or how you should be, just to fit in.

     

    You being you, and being happy, is what matters most.

     

    Jake

     

    Praise for Jake Daniels

    https://twitter.com/RevRichardColes/status/1526322784053387264
  • Who’s Davy Jones? Rebekah Vardy v Coleen Rooney 2022

    Who’s Davy Jones? Rebekah Vardy v Coleen Rooney 2022

    Matthew Steeples suggests ‘Wagatha Christie’ Coleen Rooney is made of more grit than ‘Chatty Rat’ Rebekah Vardy; that the latter asked “Who’s Davy Jones?” and turned on the tears in court is simply illustrative that she’s a true own goaler

    After reading of Rebekah Vardy putting on an Amber Heard-like crocodile tears display at the Royal Courts of Justice yesterday, I thought I’d put up a poll on Twitter to enquire as to if the public expect a similarly soppy repeat from her nemesis ‘Wagatha Christie’ Coleen Rooney today.

    In the anything but scientific survey, I asked: “Will Coleen Rooney ‘pull a Rebekah Vardy’ and turn on the tears as she gives evidence at the Royal Courts of Justice today?” Thus far, the overwhelming response is that the “granny shagger’s” wife will most certainly not. “Ice cold Miss Marple,” the public clearly believe, will be the dignified stance that the former Miss McLoughlin will display today as she faces a truly la-la leaker.

     

    As forgetful as the mendacious minx Meghan Markle when it comes to details and prone to associating with people who conveniently drop mobile telephone devices in the North Sea, thrice-married Vardy’s attempts to gain support by blubbing went down – as one could only expect in a nation where one is meant to grit one’s teeth rather than pathetically sob – like a proverbial lead balloon.

     

    Like grubby grabber Ghislaine Maxwell – who did “monster moves” and giggled with the guards she claimed had also abused her – the antics of Vardy are nothing but those of someone obsessed with having her cake and eating it. Here is a sieve-like woman and here is someone prepared even to selfishly chuck her former adviser Caroline Watt “under the bus.”

     

    Told that the missing mobile was “lying at the bottom of the sea in Davy Jones’s locker” by Rooney’s lawyer David Sherborne, emoji loving Vardy illustrated that she’d not paid attention when watching the Pirates of the Caribbean and clearly isn’t a fan of Johnny Depp either. She asked the court: “Who is Davy Jones?” and of this, The Guardian pointedly parroted: “The judge intervened to explain the reference.”

     

    Football’s equivalent of Downing Street’s ‘Chatty Rat’ Henry Newman, even if she by a remarkable chance wins, won’t break even on this pointless and pathetic case and that she has already spent over £1 million in legal fees alone is simply beyond bonkers. Now, there’s a reason for tears before breakfast and today I join those suggesting that the former I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! contestant bloody well just does the sensible thing and bites out her poisonous tongue.

     

    The blabbing blubber that is the wife of the bottom-of-the-bootleg-rum-barrel Leicester City striker Jamie Vardy would do better instead to gather whatever mates she’s got left. They should down a bottle or three of the WAGs and wazzocks’ favourite tipple, Whispering Angel, and finally – as she staggers into the hell of hangover land – she ought to realise that the case she brought is now nothing but a laughable and very costly own goal.

     

    Meanwhile, the ‘Modern Day Miss Marple’ that has morphed into the wonder that is Coleen Rooney now must show her grit and resolve and simply finish the game. It’s time to send the dippy dumbo Rebekah Vardy ‘orf!

     

    ‘Wagatha Christie’ – One, ‘Chatty Rebekah’ – Nil.

     

    Pictured top (from left to right) – The dimwitted dolly-bird who has morphed into a ‘Modern Day Miss Marple’ that is Coleen Rooney, Davy Jones and football’s ‘Chatty Rat’ Rebekah Vardy.

     

    Amber Heard
    Given her past performances at the Royal Courts of Justice, where David Sherborne was also present, Amber Heard could easily have been drafted in to teach Rebekah Vardy a thing or two about turning on the tears in the courtroom.
    Henry Newman Carrie Johnson Dilyn
    Henry Newman Carrie Johnson Dilyn
    Equally, given her clearly wicked ways with texting and WhatsApp-ing, Carie Johnson and her ‘Chatty Rat’ bestie Henry Newman could teach the Leicester City striker’s wife a thing or two about how to pugnaciously plan and deviantly dodge.
  • Moron of the Moment 2022 – Karren Brady

    Moron of the Moment 2022 – Karren Brady

    In not sacking footballer who giggled as he abused his pet cat, Karren Brady has yet again shown her true colours; shame on “overpainted Aunt Sally” Baroness Brady of Knightsbridge CBE

    “She reminds me of [the since croaked paedophile] Max Clifford, another supreme self-brander” cuttingly began Simon Hattenstone for The Guardian in his March 2018 profile of The Right Honourable The Baroness Brady of Knightsbridge CBE.

     

    Now, as a result of her reaction to one of the players at the team where she is vice chairman being filmed giggling as he kicked and slapped his pet cat, this ludicrous “overpainted Aunt Sally” has yet again very deservedly come under fire. Here, in defending West Ham’s decision to keep Kurt Zouma, is further proof of a woman whose understanding of right and wrong is most definitely warped.

     

    Writing of Zouma in her weekly column for The Sun on Sunday today, “Poundland muckspreader” Baroness Brady brushed off this vastly overpaid bag of wind kicker’s abhorrent actions by pompously stating:

     

    “He is extremely remorseful. He has said sorry… [There are] those who would like to see Kurt have his livelihood taken away… But I believe we live in a society in which the vast majority of people still value forgiveness and redemption.”

     

    “We as a club will work hard, alongside Kurt, to ensure his genuine remorse leads to a determination to address the situation and turn something negative into long-lasting positives.”

     

    Clearly whilst “try telling that to the abused cat” didn’t come into the pea sized brain of the aide to Lord Sugar on The Apprentice, responding on Twitter, sports presenter Richard Keys slammed Baroness Brady and was subsequently described as “echoing the public view” by quite rightly remarking:

     

    “It is ridiculous for @WestHam & @karren_brady to try to excuse Zouma. No it’s not like a driving offence. There are consequences for that you get banned for a year. Zouma is still playing. He’ll earn another £250,000 in a fortnight. It’s a disgrace. He shouldn’t be playing.”

     

    “This is hilarious. When did you decide this was the case @karren_brady? Was it when you realised a £30m asset might get cancelled? You didn’t feel this way a few years back when you were spreading your nonsense. Looking forward to seeing Paul at the WC.”

     

    Elsewhere yesterday, the MailOnline’s Joe Davies and Isabel Baldwin reported that the RSPCA – who took away two cats from Zouma’s home – has confirmed it has yet to receive any cash from West Ham in spite of the club having claimed donations would be made and that the player would be sent to work there.

     

    Of the situation, they added: “The RSPCA said it has not been offered or accepted a donation from the club and revealed it is still investigating Zouma’s actions.”

     

    “It said there have been no plans to offer the player animal welfare courses while the investigation is underway.”

     

    Sir Philip Green and Lady Brady
    Mouthy Poundland muckspreader Lady Brady with her deservedly loathed job destroyer mate Sir Philip Green.
    Baroness Brady David Sullivan
    Brady with West Ham co-owner David Sullivan in 1993. Mr Sullivan was mocked by fans in September 2017 when they bounced a giant inflatable sex toy around a stadium during a game against Huddersfield.
    West Ham dildo David Sullivan
    The aforementioned inflatable.

    “Overpainted Aunt Sally” Karren Brady on…

    Her destroyer of jobs and the high street mate ‘Sir Shifty’ Philip Green

    “The most dynamic, the most energetic, the most relentless business-person I have ever come across, a whirlwind of energy and ideas.”

     

    The nearly as controversial businessman Mike Ashley…

    “I feel sorry for a guy like Mike Ashley… He tried his best… I feel tremendous sympathy for Ashley.”

     

    Her “precarious work-life balance”…

    “[It’s a] balancing act… [I feel] constant guilt over being a working mother.”

     

    “I live day by day. There’s no other way.”

     

    “Dead end jobs” (that she certainly wouldn’t herself consider taking)…

    “No one wants a dead end job, but at least it’s a start.”

     

    Sexism…

    “I always laugh when I read about sexism cases in the newspaper.”

     

    “It’s rubbish to say you can’t be proper friends with the opposite sex.”

     

    Her own mistakes…

    “My greatest mistake? I once took a three-day maternity leave.”

     

    Religion…

    “I am a faithful companion of Jesus.”

     

    Contradicting herself in spite of taking up a position in David Cameron’s government as Small Business Ambassador…

    “I have no interest in politics.”

     

    Her being investigated in connection with corruption in football

    “I was in a very dark place… It was gut-wrenching… I didn’t want to have to justify myself to people.”

     

    The East End of London…

    “A hotbed of racism.”

     

    Meeting the general public…

    “I have met people in the street who say: ‘You look like Karren Brady, but she is fat.’ But I don’t care.”

     

    Her nickname at school…

    “I was called ‘Fried Eggs’ and all that at school. Size does matter.”

     

    Eating cheese…

    “I’m a hard cheese person and I could have it with biscuits for breakfast, lunch and dinner.”

     

    Condoms in the Birmingham City boardroom…

    “I found [a condom] floating in the toilet… And it became this big whodunit. I mean, in the boardroom toilet of all places.”

     

    Her “wickedly indiscreet newspaper column”…

    “It’s what I leave out that would make your hair curl.”

     

    A desire to look like Sarah, Duchess of York…

    “Deep in my soul, I’m secretly a redhead.”

     

    Her dream man…

    “I prefer my men slightly overweight. Having said that, my ultimate dream man is Jimmy Nail and he’s skinny.”

     

    Comedian David Walliams…

    “Someone needs to tell him to calm down… Creepy.”

     

    Unsurprisingly getting abuse given her own vile tongue…

    “The abuse I get is vile. And so much worse now than it’s ever been.”

     

    Herself

    “At 23, I had skin as thick as a rhino… I don’t have any fears.”

     

    “I dare to put my head above the parapet, to have a mind and a voice of my own and to plough my own furrow.”

     

    “[I am now] one of the most highly sought-after motivational speakers in the world.”

     

    “I look like a demented Rapunzel.”

     

    More modest than the late Mother Theresa, one is simply left asking: “What on earth was it about the very wealthy woman Karren Brady that David Cameron saw fit to elevate her to the House of Lords?”

     

  • Hero of the Hour 2021 – Gary Lineker OBE

    Hero of the Hour 2021 – Gary Lineker OBE

    In taking refugees into his own home, ex-footballer Gary Lineker not only puts his money where his mouth is, but also shows true compassion and decency

    Ex-footballer turned football pundit Gary Lineker is a man who puts his money where his mouth is and today with the revelation that he is taking a second refugee into his very own home, he has yet again shown his decency and humanity.

     

    Father of four and host of the BBC’s Match of the Day Lineker – in genuine contrast to the heartless harridan and immigrant hater who is now MP for Dover, Natalie Elphicke – the MailOnline revelaed is “finalising paperwork with a refugee charity at the moment and will soon take in another person from Balochistan.”

     

    Speaking to Dylan Jones of British GQ in October 2020 of why he took in a refugee on a previous occasion, Lineker explained:

     

    “I’ve always been a supporter of the refugee crisis… It’s a humanitarian issue that the whole world has to deal with… We can’t have everybody here, we know that, I know that, but we need to have our fair share and the world needs to have their fair share.”

     

    “I first supported that a few years ago and I got criticised from the national newspapers. One of them even said I should lose my job at one point because of it and I didn’t quite understand that because I didn’t think it was a political issue. I thought it was a humanitarian issue.”

     

    “I just thought: ‘How can we not have a degree of empathy towards these poor souls?’ You know, they are fleeing, like, erm, war torn countries or oppression or whatever it is. Do you think that they want leave their homes? Of course they don’t. They’re forced out. They have to travel the world.”

     

    “Take for example the dinghies in the English Channel. Do you think that is what they want to do? They’re desperate and then when they arrive somewhere, they’re filled not with affection or love or anything or understanding or empathy or sympathy, but with a degree of hatred and not being wanted.”

     

    “Imagine if that was the other way around. Imagine if that was in London. Suddenly we were bombed everywhere and we all had to go and we fled. It is unimaginable, I know, but it does happen to real people, fellow human beings. Imagine if we suddenly had to flee and no one wants you. How awful would that be?”

     

    “That’s how it started. So, getting around to taking in a refugee myself… The strange argument I used to think was always: ‘Well, why don’t you have them in your house then?’ and I used to think: ‘Is that your problem: You think you are going to have them living in your house?’ which is clearly not the case, so in the end having had that constantly thrown at me for years, I actually started to think: ‘Well, why wouldn’t I?”

     

    “My kids have all grown up now, they’re all in their twenties and, erm, and I did a little thing, I can’t remember with who, getting a bit of stick on Twitter and it was the same thing and then underneath, I don’t actually look at the notifications, only of the people that I follow or blue ticked posters, but underneath the tweet sometimes you do see a couple of tweets below.”

     

    “I saw one that said: ‘Gary, you might be interested in this’ and so I clicked on it and it was a charity called Refugees at Home, so I thought: ‘What’s that?’ so I clicked on it and it offered you different things. You could have someone on a short-term basis, a permanent basis or almost like an emergency foster parent – which I thought sounds, erm, quite interesting so I clicked on that and then I went through the process.”

     

    “I had my first refugee in the last few weeks and he left at the weekend. A delightful chap [named Rasheed], brilliant for my children and even they were saying what a perception.”

     

    “He was from a place called Balochistan, which is actually part of Pakistan, but they don’t want you to be. He’s come here to study law, he wants to free his country, he wants to get them independent from both Pakistan and Iran. It’ll be difficult because they’ve got minerals, gold and natural gas, but it’s fascinating, a real education for my boys as well because obviously they’re privileged. They know they’re privileged, but they’re keen to hear this guy’s story. He was brilliant with them. It was a really, really positive experience and I’ll definitely do it again.”

     

    Praised previously as “the sensible face of our country” by ex-MP Anna Soubry, Gary Lineker is someone who also uses his powerful voice for the good on social media and someone who refuses to work in Qatar because of their appalling human rights abuses record. Here is someone who most definitely deserves to be lauded as The Steeple Times ‘Hero of the Hour’ and today and we urge our readers to join the 8.2 million individuals already following him on Twitter.

     

    The letter sent to Lineker by law student Rasheed:

    Dear Garry Lineker,

     

    When I was moving to your home, I was worried that you might be unfriendly and conservative but it was all reverse what I thought.

     

    During my stay in your beautiful home, I never felt that I am a stranger or guest but it seemed to me as if I am a member of your family.

     

    I can never forget your hospitality, love and company that you and your lovely respectful children gave to me.

     

    There is a saying in Balochi language, that if you give me a glass of water, I owe you my entire life. In fact you did more.

     

    Best wishes,

     

    Rasheed

    Refugee article and letter
    A headline from ‘The Mirror’ about Lineker taking in a refugee in 2020 and the letter the ex-footballer received from that person thanking him.
    Refugee tweet
    The sports broadcaster responded to the letter with a typically decent tweet.