Category: Deviants

Deviant

  • Sunday Stroll, 21st June 2026 – Walking Tour of the Crime Scenes of the Rich & Famous: SW1 & SW3

    Sunday Stroll, 21st June 2026 – Walking Tour of the Crime Scenes of the Rich & Famous: SW1 & SW3

    Join on Sunday 21st June for a personally guided walking tour of the crime scenes of Belgravia, Chelsea and Knightsbridge with Matthew Steeples of ‘The Steeple Times’ including locations linked to Lord Lucan, Ghislaine Maxwell and Oscar Wilde

    Sunday 21st June 2026 – 10.30am for prompt 11am departure

    Matthew Steeples will be your guide as you explore some of London’s most storied neighbourhoods. Whilst the addresses we’ll visit may seem to be ritzy superficially, you’ll learn of the darker events that have occurred in SW1 and SW3 alongside some jollier details too. Aside from buildings connected to Ghislaine Maxwell and Lord Lucan, you will hear the story of a high society ‘Bright Young Thing’ who got away with murder and a Bakelite plastics heir who ultimately didn’t; this will be a thought provoking tour where there’ll also be plenty of opportunity for questions and conversation.

    Duration:

    2 to 2.5 hours including one stop at a halfway point for brief refreshments and use of facilities, if participants feel the need for such.

    Sunday Stroll Crimes of the Rich and Famous Walk Lady Victoria Hervey Matthew Steeples
    Sunday Stroll Crimes of the Rich and Famous Walk 1
    Sunday Stroll Crimes of the Rich and Famous Walk 2

    Details:

    Starting point – Belgravia, SW1X; nearest underground stations are Knightsbridge and Sloane Square.

    The exact meeting point will be confirmed after your booking has been made.

    Finishing point – Chelsea, SW3.

    Participants will be welcome to join for drinks at the end of the walk (at their own expense).

     

    Participants should be over 18 years of age to enjoy the experience to the full and are advised to wear suitable attire for walking in Central London.

    Booking:

    To book your tickets, please click the following link to pay £30 per person attending:

    https://monzo.com/pay/r/longreach-publishing-limi_5DmPlIyBxXGGEA

    Alternatively, pay £30 per person via bank transfer to:

    Account name: Longreach Publishing Limited

    Bank: Monzo Bank Limited

    Sort code: 04-00-06

    Account number: 90607601

    Once you have booked, please email editorial@thesteepletimes.com to confirm your booking. Bookings will be accepted on a first come, first served basis; places on the tour are limited.

    Please note that all food and drink is to be purchased at your own expense and that though tickets are non-refundable, they are transferable.

    Please direct any additional enquiries to editorial@thesteepletimes.com

    Sophie from Southwark, London – Endorsement of previous tour:

    “The tour was both enjoyable and fascinating, with Matthew pointing out both well-known and not-so-well-known crimes. I’ve done a few walking tours here and there and this one was the best – Matthew really knows the history and the who’s who of the area. I highly recommend the tour for both information and general entertainment value.”

    Follow Matthew Steeples on X at @M_Steeples and The Steeple Times at @SteepleTimes.

     

    Subscribe to our YouTube channel at @mjs2781 or become a member even.

     

    If you haven’t done so already, please support keeping The Steeple Times in the business of telling the stories that the mainstream media don’t dare touch by helping fund our work via Patreon. Even a small donation will help keep us going and will be hugely appreciated.

     

    Buy Matthew Steeples a tea (or better a gin) via Ko-fi.

     

  • A ‘Private Eye’ At Crackpot Crazy Classifieds – 1974 Princess Anne Kidnap Attempt

    A ‘Private Eye’ At Crackpot Crazy Classifieds – 1974 Princess Anne Kidnap Attempt

    ‘Private Eye’ called out for publishing classified adverts from wacko wannabe “Village Elders” with a penchant for “amusing kids” and an actual crackpot crazy who tried and failed to kidnap Princess Anne in London in 1974

    The latest edition of Private Eye contains an especially creepy classified advertisement. A link to it was sent to us by an especially beady eyed reader. It states:

     

    Couple (60s) seek position as Village Elders in a community. Skills include knitting, martial arts, book-keeping, business advice, vegetable growing and amusing the kids. Any location worldwide but must speak English. No remuneration needed. Text 07486 434079 for more details.

     

    Aside from the Jimmy Savile-esque vibes that the throwaway inclusion of “amusing kids” gives off, the fact that two sixty somethings of sex undefined want to move utterly anywhere for utterly no payment seems a little beyond weird. Whilst calls and texts from The Steeple Times to the number for the knitting and martial arts lovers listed were not answered, what’s the betting on these wannabe “Village Elders” being successful in their quest for their wacko wants? We wouldn’t go below 999/1.

     

    The advert posted by the wannabe “Village Elders” that will likely not result in them achieving the placement they desire.
    The advert posted by the wannabe “Village Elders” that will likely not result in them achieving the placement they desire.

    Elsewhere in the same magazine’s classified section is an advert placed by another oddity named Ian Ball. It doesn’t exactly share a great deal of detail, but simply offers:

     

    ‘To Kidnap a Princess’ by Ian Ball noveltokidnapaprincess.co.uk

     

    For the majority whom unsurprisingly don’t immediately recognise this somewhat ordinary sounding name, this is the very same Ian Ball who attempted to kidnap Princess Anne on 20th March 1974 on Pall Mall in London, but who only succeeded in injuring a number of bystanders with a series of shots. Ball failed in his attempt – which was later bizarrely ‘justified’ as a “publicity stunt” and an attempt to raise £2 million from a ransom that he claimed he intended to give to the NHS – and subsequently pleaded guilty to attempted murder and kidnapping. John Hazan QC, defending, claimed his client was “mad” and had been “led by a voice of either his late father or God.”

     

    Top: The attempted kidnapping of Princess Anne in March 1974, as reconstructed in the 2006 ITV drama ‘To Kidnap A Princess’. Bottom: Failed kidnapper Ian Ball snapped arriving for his trial and the Rolls-Royce in which Princess Anne travelled on the night of the attempt to abduct her.
    Top: The attempted kidnapping of Princess Anne in March 1974, as reconstructed in the 2006 ITV drama ‘To Kidnap A Princess’. Bottom: Failed kidnapper Ian Ball snapped arriving for his trial and the Rolls-Royce in which Princess Anne travelled on the night of the attempt to abduct her.
    Ian Ball To Kidnap a Princess, Princess Anne, 1974, London
    The advert promoting Ian Ball’s book.

    Ball – who also goes by the pseudonym ‘Anthony Stewart’ – was subsequently diagnosed with schizophrenia and detained in mental hospitals for 45 years until his release in 2019. In August 2025, he laughably claimed the late Queen Elizabeth II had been the “ringleader” of a plot that led to him being wrongfully jailed and told the Daily Mail: “I’m an innocent, sane man… The whole idea of performing the hoax was to get the publicity so I could write my autobiography and I expected to get £10,000 in royalties.”

     

    Going further, on the website linked to from the online version of the weekly magazine, most certainly beyond bonkers Ball rages whilst promoting his tall tale tome To Kidnap a Princess:

     

    “The author spent 45 years locked up in Rampton and Broadmoor criminal lunatic asylums, after being convicted of the attempted kidnapping of Princess Anne.”

     

    “Throughout his stay in the asylums he was in constant conflict with the psychopathic screws and criminal doctors.”

     

    “The abuse resulting from the conflict was born with a remarkable stoicism and with an astonishing positive attitude. Such resilience was due, mainly, to the author’s efforts in applying his hilariously unique and wry sense of humour to the situation.”

     

    “Although the authorities did everything to try and break his spirit, the author remains unbowed and eventually prevails.”

     

    In light of the highlighting of these two clearly crackpot advertisements, perhaps Private Eye might henceforth implement a better procedure to vet those taking space in their classifieds. Paraphrasing what Princess Anne is said to have exclaimed on being ordered out of her chauffeur driven Rolls-Royce by her wannabe kidnapper Ian Ball that dark night in March 1974, the chances of such are probably to be found in the land of “not bloody likely!”

     

    Follow Matthew Steeples on X at @M_Steeples and The Steeple Times at @SteepleTimes.

     

    Subscribe to our YouTube channel at @mjs2781.

     

    If you haven’t done so already, please support keeping The Steeple Times in the business of telling the stories that the mainstream media don’t dare touch by helping fund our work via Patreon. Even a small donation will help keep us going and will be hugely appreciated.

     

  • Morons of the Moment 2024 – Filthy Fylde Conservative Association

    Morons of the Moment 2024 – Filthy Fylde Conservative Association

    As man-pestering Mark Menzies, the MP they have supported since 2008, is exposed for yet more sordid sexual shenanigans, the Fylde Conservative Association yet again prove themselves a bunch of nutty nincompoops by sharing tweets about “vile degenerates” making “sexually explicit” comments

    The Fylde Conservative Association clearly didn’t give two hoots when the MP they have repeatedly supported since his selection as a candidate in 2008, Mark Menzies, got accused of shady sexual shenanigans with a 19-year-old Brazilian male hooker named Rogerio Santos in 2014.

     

    At that time, when Santos alleged pugnacious politician Menzies asked him to “buy ‘the poor man’s cocaine’ methedrone” and “have sex with him,” then Councillor Brenda Ackers brazenly barracked: “He has the total support of myself and two other members of the management team, they both support Mark also. [Members will be] very upset, both on Mark’s behalf and the fact that we like things to run smoothly in Fylde.”

     

    This very same gaggle of gaga grannies that Ackers headed also didn’t give two hoots when this Scottish born Roman Catholic faced a police investigation for allegedly getting a dog pissed-off-its-skull in 2015. Equally, they didn’t give two hoots that this menace-to-men also faced further police questioning for “brawling” with a friend in 2015.

     

    Later that year, the very same membership of the Fylde Conservative Association – when Menzies was subsequently proven “just” to have stood on and taken pictures whilst yet another of his so-called “friends” getting the aforementioned pooch pissed to the point of “poisoned” and “intoxicated” – clearly chose to show not an ounce of moral backbone. They again selected this raging rotten-to-his-core ratbag in 2017 and 2019.

     

    Now, as mucky Menzies faces allegations that he misused party funds to “pay some bad people” in yet another sexual scandal involving multiple men, the Fylde Conservative Association have yet again swept the issue-in-hand under the carpet. On Tuesday, on their Twitter feed, this bunch of brazen buffoons reposted a tweet by Rishi Sunak.

     

    It read: “This government is cracking down on the vile degenerates who make sexually explicit ‘deepfakes.’ We’re introducing a new law to ban the creation of these distressing and abusing images… Making a sexually explicit ‘deepfake’ image without consent is to become a new offence, with those convicted facing a criminal record and an unlimited fine.”

     

    Curiously however, the Fylde Conservative Association – whose members would definitely feel at home with other “naughty Tory” sex pests including Charlie Elphicke and “bum groper” Chris Pincher – failed to make any mention of their views on Mark Menzies and his “middle of the night” activities involving one of their number paying “money after [Menzies] meeting a man he met on a dating website.”

     

    According to The Guardian: “The source said Menzies had gone to the man’s flat, before going with another man to a second address, where he continued drinking. People at the address falsely claimed he had been sick and demanded £5,000 for cleaning up and other expenses, according to this account.”

     

    “The source close to Menzies told The Times he paid the money because he was afraid of what would happen if he refused, but had insufficient funds in his own savings. They claimed he offered to repay the sum, but that local Tories who controlled the campaign funds said he did not need to.”

     

    Whatever next for the Fylde Conservative Association? A party fundraiser for ‘Not-So-Dishy-Rishi’ down the local male brothel in Lytham St Annes?

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples and watch his current nightly show on YouTube at 8.30pm daily.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers. If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Rishi Sunak sexual deepfake tweet
    The Fylde Conservative Association (FCA) showed no sense of shame for their support since 2008 of Mark Menzies – a mouse not a man capable of waking old ladies at 3.15am to demand help in paying off “bad people” he’d supposedly hooked up with via gay dating websites. Instead, on the very day Menzies was exposed by ‘The Times’ – and after they clearly would have been approached for comment – they opted to retweet a missive about Rishi Sunak’s government “cracking down on the vile degenerates who make sexually explicit ‘deepfakes’” and which mentioned a “new law to ban the creation of these distressing and offensive images.” Perhaps, the concept of those in glass houses and stones had passed the gaga grannies and grandpas of Fylde that form the FCA by, but maybe they should have dealt with their own local degenerate, Mark Menzies, at an earlier date given his previous form with Brazilian rent boys, photographing friends poisoning dogs and getting them drunk and “brawling” with supposed friends.
    Mark Menzies Rogerio Santos sex scandal rent boy
    Forced to resign the Conservative whip on 17th April 2024, Mark Menzies has previous form having been the subject of front page about his activities with young men on several occasions. One is left asking: “What on earth was it about this scandal prone scrounger that made the Fylde Conservative Association to continue to select him as their parliamentary candidate four times from 2008 onwards? Could they really not find someone with more decency and dignity than this degenerate deadbeat?”
    Mark Menzies concerns
    Mucky menace and former Marks & Spencer employee Menzies tweeted on the 12th April about “concerns” about St Annes beach. He failed to address the fact there have bene far more significant “concerns” about his personal behaviour for months. In an “exclusive” in which she “broke her silence” on Thursday 18th April 2024, the ‘Mirror’ reported that Katie Fieldhouse, 78, a former Lady of Mayoress of Fylde, said she received a call from Menzies at 3.15am on 1st December 2023, “in which he allegedly asked for £5,000 as he was locked in a flat with some ‘bad people’ … and branded his behaviour unacceptable.” Ms Fieldhouse claimed she “refused and called his office manager who later stumped up the sum, which had risen to £6,500. She was later reimbursed from a campaign fund paid for by donors, the paper reported… Ms Fieldhouse told the ‘Mirror’ that she later contacted the Tory party, in January to express her ‘concerns’ about Mr Menzies. ‘I spoke to the chief whip on the 3rd of January and told him my concerns’ she said. ‘All the things that had happened accumulated in my head. I came to the conclusion that something had to be done about it because I have a great fondness for my constituency. Ms Fieldhouse would not comment when asked if she thought the MP should resign. But she said: ‘I put my faith in the Conservative Party to deal with Mr Menzies.’ She continued: ‘I am a devout Conservative, all my life, and also a devout Christian, and I cannot accept his behaviour. It is very upsetting.’ Ms Fieldhouse said she was approached by ‘The Times’ after speaking to the chief whip. And she added: ‘I have read the article in ‘The Times.’ Everything in it is true.’” Ms Fieldhouse had previously not been named in ‘The Times’ article by senior investigations reporter Billy Kenber whilst Menzies responded: “I strongly dispute the allegations put to me. I have fully complied with all the rules for declarations. As there is an investigation ongoing I will not be commenting further.”
    Brenda Ackers Mark Menzies Conservative MP Fylde sex scandal
    Brenda Ackers – who defended her chum Mark Menzies in 2015 by stating: “He has the total support of myself and two other members of the management team, they both support Mark also. [Members will be] very upset, both on Mark’s behalf and the fact that we like things to run smoothly in Fylde” – herself has form. In September 2013, according to Blackpool rag ‘The Gazette,’ Ms Ackers was “reprimanded by the mayor” for refusing to apologise for making “disrespectful remarks.” Speaking to the paper, she raged: “I don’t know why the mayor interrupted me because nothing that I said was in any way objectionable.” In turn “rebuking her,” another councillor stated: “When the mayor stands, the councillor sits down” as she was “greeted with heckles of ‘sit down, shut up.”
    Twitter handle FCA
    The Twitter handle of the repeatedly disgraced MP’s former constituency association has not even updated to reflect the fact that he is no longer a Conservative Member of Parliament.
  • The Art Of Freedom – Feckless Fraudster Inigo Philbrick Freed From Clink

    The Art Of Freedom – Feckless Fraudster Inigo Philbrick Freed From Clink

    Matthew Steeples reveals that £70 million art fraudster Inigo Philbrick has been disgracefully freed after just 1-year and and 8 months in jail in spite of being sentenced to 7-years in the clink

    Art buyers everywhere beware; “The Talented Mr Philbrick” – as The New York Times’s Jacob Bernstein dubbed “vain” and “greedy” Inigo Philbrick in March 2020 – is once again a free man.

     

    Featured in an article by The Daily Mail’s Richard Eden this morning after a certain someone tipped them off, this 35-36-year-old American of age uncertain even (Wikipedia list this swindler as having been born in either 1987 or 1988) was released from prison on the 10th February 2024 according to the Federal Bureau of Prisons website.

     

    To read more about Inigo Philbrick, purchase ‘All That Glitters’ by Orlando Whitfield via our online Bookshop.org shop at a discounted rate whilst supporting independent book shops.

     

    In spite of being sentenced to just over 7 years in the clink for his fraudulent crimes, Philbrick’s release comes astonishingly exactly 1 year, 8 months and 18 days since he was sent down on 23rd May 2022. He had previously spent one-and-half years in prison after being captured by the FBI whilst on the run in Port Vila, the capital of the Pacific isle of Vanatu on 11th June 2020.

     

    Devious degenerate Philbrick will now spend two years under conditions of supervised release. He will, however, most likely never repay the £67.8 million ($86 million) that he was ordered to repay in fraud restitution by Southern District of New York judge Sidney H. Stein. Other notable presided trials presided over by “fair-minded… giant of the court” Stein have numbered Senator Bob Menendez and Real Housewives of Salt Lake City ‘star’ Jen Shah.

     

    Victims of this father of two by two different women, mouthy Made in Chelsea menace Victoria Baker-Harber and “Buenos Aires–born art adviser turned perfume maker” Francisca Mancini, included billionaire brothers David and Simon Reuben, art dealer Jay Jopling and son-in-law of Marc and Denise Rich art collector Kenny Schacter.

     

    Philbrick’s ex-McKinsey & Company employee associate Robert Newland was separately sentenced to nearly two years in jail for his part in the crime. He was ordered to pay £53.3 million ($67.5 million) in restitution and forfeited four paintings and a Jean Prouvé desk.

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples and watch his current nightly show on YouTube at 8.30pm daily.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers. If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

  • A Carbonara Calamity – Feckless Fergie & Creepy Christian Crooner Cliff Appear on ‘This Morning’

    A Carbonara Calamity – Feckless Fergie & Creepy Christian Crooner Cliff Appear on ‘This Morning’

    What was Martin Frizell thinking in allowing carbonara munching Sarah, Duchess of York to guest edit and co-host ‘This Morning’ and what was he thinking in pairing her up with the creepy Christian crooner and “fat shamer” Sir Cliff Richard?

    On Monday, notable aubergine loather Martin Frizell continued his “ill-judged” ways and brought two of the most cretinous Brits available onto the show he laughably attempts to “edit” for ITV, This Morning.

     

    Frizell’s especially dreadful pairing? She who happily took loans and other benefits (without necessarily ever repaying) from the since croaked paedophile Jeffrey Epstein, Sarah, Duchess of York, and the creepy Christian crooner known best for crying on his kitchen floor, Sir Cliff Richard. Quite frankly, this choice can only be surmised as one taken by a halfwit.

     

    Frizzell – whom was deservedly condemned by John Nicholson MP as “outrageously dismissive and flippant on camera about [the] immensely serious issue” of the Phillip Schofield scandal back in June during a hearing of the Culture, Media and Sport Committee – is definitely a chap with skin thicker than an aubergine. However, in inviting “needy and greedy” Sarah, Duchess of York to guest edit and co-host ITV1’s flagship morning show, he most certainly scored yet another own goal and most definitely caused another nail to be banged into this tacky show’s coffin.

     

    Featuring a segment in which ‘Feckless Fergie’ apparently decided a winner of Iron Chef UK in 2010 named Marcus Bean should cook her carbonara – a rather simple to make dish she claimed she’d never actually seen being made before – here was an example of a car crash calamity that lasted an excruciating two-and-a-half hours. In it, the live-in ex-wife of non-sweaty ‘Randy’ Prince Andrew laughed like a hyena and pranced like a show pony; she had no idea what she was doing and quite frankly brought shame on her royal relatives.

     

    Whilst one should ask if this tawdry twerp – whom, during a phone-in segment about relationships, crassly advised ‘Suzanne from Newcastle’ to start wearing “saucy underwear sets” to spice up her and her hubby’s somewhat lacking sex lives – had sought out the advice of His Majesty King Charles’s advisors before agreeing to a television ‘outing’ of this type, another question has to be: “How much was this mother of two princesses paid for what could be the first of a series of “co-host” appearances?”

     

    “It’s your show, I’ll be the fluff” giggled the former Sarah Ferguson as the show started. By the end, she was lauded as having “totally undersold [herself]” by a somewhat soppy Dermot O’Leary, but her final guest of choosing just truly illustrated what a prized pillock this wastrel wazzock genuinely, really genuinely is.

     

    Whilst some – myself included in the past – have pointed out that this apologist for a Pizza Express loving prince known best for hanging around with despots and dictators and for paying around £12 million to a woman he allegedly did not have sexual relations often exhibits childish ways in her way of thinking, her description of Devil Woman singer ‘Cliffy’ was yet another in a long line of outings of her appallingly bad judgment.

     

    After bigging-up the one-time mate of the croaked child abuser Rolf Harris as “humble and kind,” the “Peter Pan of Pop” turned nasty. He spoke of how he hadn’t wanted to be photographed with Elvis Presley because “he’d put on weight… If I’m having him hanging on my refrigerator, of course he’s got to look good” and did so in front of a self-professed ‘larger’ lady, Alison Hammond. Then “put in his place,” as the MailOnline’s Laura Parkin referenced the response to the museli muncher, Hammond quipped back: “You should never have put it off just because they’re a little bit heavier… Is that why you don’t want me at your house?” Bizarrely, Fergie didn’t bat an eyelid.

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples and watch his current nightly show on YouTube at 8pm GMT daily.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers. If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Twitter poll Sarah Duches of York This Morning
    On Monday 20th November on Twitter, Matthew Steeples asked: “Is it appropriate for non-sweaty Prince Andrew’s live-in ex-wife Sarah, Duchess of York to lower herself to ‘co-hosting’ funeral queue-jumper’s favourite show ‘This Morning’?” He added the hahtags: #ThisMorning #ITV #Fergie #DuchessOfYork #PrinceAndrew #royal #royalty #outrage #disgrace and of the four available responses, 43.7% favoured the answer: “No – Shameful; Tacky” whilst 33.7% opted for “No – Shows ITV’s decline.” Just 14.2% felt: “Yes – She’s a fun choice” whilst only 8.4% supported: “Yes – She needs the wonga.”
    Mirror poll Sarah Duches of York This Morning
    On the same day, ‘The Mirror’ asked: “Do you think Cliff Richard’s comments on ‘This Morning’ were inappropriate?” 83% of respondents unsurprisingly answered: “Yes, they were.”

    Feckless Fergie’s ‘This Morning’ F**k-up… The Main Moments…

    To her This Morning co-hosts Alison Hammond and Dermot O’Leary on Monday 20th November 2023: “We’re on. I’m terrified. It’s your show, I’ll be the fluff.”

     

    Appropriately given her penchant for wonga-wonga (especially from the likes of the late, not-so-great Jeffrey Epstein), whilst spinning a wheel in a game named Spin to Win: “Show me the money.”

     

    Asked by Dermot O’Leary: “Can you just give us a little insight into what Christmas dinner is like with the royal family?” the normally turbo-tongued Fergie answered: “Beans on toast.”

     

    Asked about her relationships with people: “I prefer animals. It’s all about kindness.”

     

    “I think I’ve been around the block. It’s cool to be here, but cool people don’t say it’s cool.”

     

    Of what she gets upto in relationships: “I used to leave love notes…. I love a little note in the pocket. I love the moment where he suddenly or she suddenly puts their hand in the pocket and sees a love note. I used to do that – put them in the squash shoes.”

     

    During a phone-in about relationships whilst playing at being an agony aunt: “Ask me just about anything, ring in about love, relationships, hard times.” (ITV clearly did not allow anyone to phone in about ‘Randy’ Prince Andrew nor the many times ‘Feckless Fergie’ has dragged the royal family’s ‘good name’ through the mire).

     

    Illustrating that she hasn’t a clue how to boil a bowl of pasta, to her carbonara cook, Marcus Bean: “You’re very good looking… Do people really listen to him whilst in the bath?”

     

    “I really love that you have shown me how to [cook carbonara] and that is the first time I have seen it done.”

     

    To a caller, Suzanne from Newcastle, wanting relationship advice: “Yah. Get a lovely saucy underwear set from your chest of drawers, blow dry the hair and take him out on a treat… It’s the element of surprise and it will bring the magic back into your relationship… It needs to be more treats that he’s lost for words.”

     

    “You’ve got this Suzanne and I’m so proud of you calling today and being so brave to ring us. Well done you. Now, get that sexy underwear out.”

     

    To other callers, clearly not realising the ongoing cost of living crisis for most viewers: “There need to be more treats. Treats. Treats. Treats… Lovely, lovely restaurants and lovely hotels.”

     

    To a caller whose husband likes climbing: “You could say: Darling, I’ve booked your favourite place to climb, I will just be, you know, just waiting when you come back, you go climbing and when you come back we can have a lovely weekend with the saucy underwear on… Rekindle.”

     

    Of Artificial Intelligence (AI): “I don’t think anyone watching should be frightened of AI. Maybe, progressing, going forward, it can be a useful tool.”

     

    Of looking after rehomed dogs: “Do you shave the chest first if they are ‘vairy’ hairy?”

     

    Of creepy Christian crooner Sir Cliff Richard: “I’m lost for words and that’s just very unlike me… You are a musical treasure… You’re incredible, I can’t get over it, it’s just incredible… All those hip moves.”

     

    “You really are as humble and as kind as you always have been. How do you do that?” (He pompously answered: “For me, it comes easily.”

     

    To the tawdry presenters of ITV1’s Loose Women whilst Gloria Hunniford danced like a fool just before the end of her first This Morning guest edit and co-host session: “I feel like I’m back home again.”

     

    The Media Response…

    Stuart Heritage, The Guardian (1 star out of 5): “Sarah Ferguson’s love tips make a doomed show even more disastrous… Can the Duchess of York present TV? Not one bit. Does the Autocue short-circuit her brain? Oh yes. Will she save this sinking ship? Never?”

     

    “Is Sarah Ferguson an experienced television presenter? No she is not. Does she look as if she has ever watched a single episode of daytime television in her life? Also no. Can she read full sentences? On the basis of her performance today, it’s debatable. Did the whole thing stink of a publicity stunt designed purely to drown out the show’s obvious death rattle? God, yes.”

     

    “Clearly, the heroes here are Hammond and O’Leary, two exceptionally safe pairs of hands, who managed to guide Ferguson through the show in the same way you help a drunk friend safely through their front door. The presenters were perfect foils to the duchess throughout and this stupid attention-seeking act would have fallen apart in seconds without them.”

     

    “Let’s be clear, getting Ferguson to host This Morning was a very silly idea. None of it made for good, or even very competent, television. But it did give you the same sort of thrill that you got at school whenever a dog broke through the fence and started running around the playing field. For a show that’s in as much trouble as This Morning is, it just about counts as a victory.”

     

    Tina Campbell for The Standard: “Viewers have been left unimpressed by Sarah, Duchess of York’s ‘painful’ co-hosting debut.”

     

    Jan Moir, Daily Mail: “Sarah, Duchess of York, guest-edited and co-presented a special edition of This Morning (ITV) on Monday. I want to be honest. I want to be kind. Yet when it comes to the Duchess in a live television situation, these two virtues become mutually and volcanically exclusive.”

     

    “From 10am until the show ended, 150 white-knuckle minutes later, the Ferg launching herself on to daytime television, like Icarus in reverse thrust, was every bit as marvelously terrible as I had hoped.”

     

    “Hard to pick a highlight amongst the word-mangling, corgi-wrangling spaghetti cook-in and the interview with Sir Cliff Richard (Fergie: ‘You really are as humble and as kind as you always have been, how do you do that?’ Sir Cliff: ‘For me, it comes easily.’ But her brief turn as a phone-in agony aunt was exquisite.”

     

    “‘Basically she has been around the block and she is here to help,’ said host Dermot O’Leary, making Fergie sound like an obliging pony with a dodgy past and the foamy fetlocks to match – and to be fair, that is not a million miles from the truth.”

     

    “In her green outfit and pixie boots, she looked like Mad Mother Elf, a panto character in search of a plot, which also kind of sums up her life to date… Still, this may have been the most exciting episode of This Morning in the show’s history.”

     

    The Twitter Response…

    “Sorry, I tuned out… I haven’t unclenched my fists since 10am.”

     

    “The whole Sarah Ferguson thing is so random and actually quite awkward to watch.”

     

    “Any comment about ‘Mr Humble’ fat shaming Elvis, making Alison having to comment with no support from you [Sarah, Duchess of York] or Dermot? You’ve had terrible things said about your weight, but still groveled to that vile man [Sir Cliff Richard]. State of him.”

     

    “How weird that This Morning got rid of John Leslie, Fred Talbot and Phillip Schofield – but they bring in the paedophile loan taker Sarah Ferguson.”

     

    “‘How do we keep our spark alive?’ … Sarah Ferguson… Letting your husband go on a lads’ holiday. If has a mate with a private island in the Caribbean, that’s ideal. Always used to cheer Andrew right up!”

     

    “Husband said this morning that Sarah, Duchess of York giving relationship advice is like the fox in the hen house teaching chickens.”

     

    “Oh dear, Sarah Ferguson – who “sold Andrew for £500,000 in cash for royal access scandal” – gets her own television programme show. #ThisMorning.”

     

    “So Cliff Richard fat shaming Elvis and saying he didn’t want a photo of him hanging on his fridge forever. After, Sarah Ferguson called him ‘humble.’ What the actual heck?”

     

    “Who on earth thought Sarah Ferguson would make good telly?”

     

    “Sarah Ferguson mentioned on Epstein flight logs, but This Morning wants to hire her. Has anyone asked any questions about this?”

     

    The Previous Weird Words of “Greedy” and “Needy” Freeloader Sarah, Duchess of York…

    Sarah, Duchess of York, the live-in ex-wife at Royal Lodge, Windsor of supposedly skint ‘Randy Andy’ – a non-sweating nuisance who got his long-suffering relatives to pay a supposed sum of circa £12 million to Virginia Roberts Giuffre, a woman he has previously claimed to have met – is known for her weird warblings. They number:

     

    Of sex, herself and goats: “One of the worst headlines said 82% [of the population] would rather sleep with a goat than Fergie. It’s never left me.”

     

    Of her writing novels and her style: “Sherlock Holmes meets Peaky Blinders.”

     

    Of the royal family: “They tried to put the little redhead in a cage.”

     

    Of her own family: “I do believe in family unity. I think forgiveness is key.”

     

    Of the Duke of York: “A good man… In 1986, I married a very good man. Zip.”

     

    Of whether she might remarry Prince Andrew: “Oh bless your heart, no. I think we’re great as we are.”

     

    Of supporting her disgraced ex-husband financially: “I will always be there [for Prince Andrew].”

     

    “When Andrew went through a hard time, I used to be able to throw it to ‘The Boss.’”

     

    “Since he stepped back [from royal duties] he doesn’t actually take taxpayers’ money and I’m in a position where I can support him and the rest of the family through my work. And I’m really pleased and proud to do that.”

     

    “All I will say is that for many years now – it started with Budgie the Little Helicopter – I’ve really pushed to look after my girls and to contribute to the York family life.”

     

    Of where she and the Duke of York will end up living in the future: “Honestly, I operate from living in the present. You never get complacent and it makes for a better day because you never get disappointed, then. You look at life and you go, we can adapt, we can be flexible.”

     

    Of whether she might remarry someone else: “I think I’ve got too much baggage. I look at today and if suddenly I find love again, well, that’s another bonus, isn’t it?”

     

    Of her daughters Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie: “Exceptional… I love my girlies, I’m so proud of them. They are exceptional children… If mum’s OK, they’re OK.”

     

    “My daughters come first in my life, they always have. Because I lost my mum so early, I’m subconsciously very present with them. When I brought them up, I always left my problems at the door. Your problem is not their problem – it’s not their fault. We laugh together a lot. We are just very close.”

     

    Of her grandchildren: “I’m ‘Super Gran’… When my grandchildren see me, they immediately laugh because they know I’m going to be up to something, up to no good somewhere.”

     

    “Every time I think about about co-parenting and co-grandparenting and about divorce, marriage and all these different things, I still come back to the principle that the sun will come up tomorrow, and be grateful, just get on with it.”

     

    Of the late Queen Elizabeth II: “For me, she was more a mother than my own mother. Aren’t I the luckiest person alive to have had that great honour? When I was with her, I used to say: ‘I can’t believe it. People wait and put on their best dress to have an audience with you, and I’m wandering around the garden in wellies!’”

     

    “For the whole nation, for the world. Steadfast, consistent, iconic. [She had an] extraordinary ability to put someone at ease. I still now think it was such an honour [to have known her].”

     

    “During the last three years, her poor son [was] going through such a tumultuous time… And I think HM was very relieved I could help her with him, so we became even closer, then.”

     

    “I’m so lucky. All my life, I was lucky enough to know ‘The Boss,’ HM. Like the nation and the world, she was always there. It was like having a hand at your back. It just made you always strive for being better and trying to be better, learning from her, whenever you were with her just taking everything she said as a memory. She was such an incredible legend for us all.”

     

    Of the late Queen’s corgis: “They’re very good boys, they’re very gentle. I think they knew that they weren’t to jump up and be naughty. They used to sit and watch the racing with her. And when you give them a biscuit, they don’t snatch. They’re very special, they’re national treasures.”

     

    “They really make me laugh and the follow me around. Sometimes I break a little ‘biccie’ – a digestive biscuit – in the same way the Queen broke it into little pieces, and give it to them and tell them to remember their boss.”

     

    Of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex: “I have been judged all my life, and I have no judgment on the Sussexes.”

     

    “It must be hard for Meghan and can I relate to her. I believe she is modern and fabulous. She was famous before. She is great. Why can’t Meghan be great? Why can’t she be celebrated? I have been in Meghan’s shoes, and I still am. There’s always a twist of negativity and it just gets so sad and tiring… I abhor bullying and I feel desperately sorry for the pain they must be going through.”

     

    “I believe very strongly that I have absolutely no judgment on any other person’s life, and I look at how much she [Meghan] loves him [Harry] and loves the children and gives him a love that he’s never had before. That’s how I look at it… The most important thing is, Diana would be so very proud of Archie and Lili. She would have adored every moment of it.”


    Of King Charles III: “It’s incredible what he’s done for the environment. He was a trailblazer and many years ago, everybody said: ‘What’s he talking about?’ But he’s right. I’m a great believer and supporter of him, as I am of the Queen Consort.”

     

    Of herself and her life: “I have been in the gutter.”

     

    “I’m a brilliant mother. The best mother.”

     

    “I don’t believe that any single person has the right to judge another person. I’m not in a position myself to make any judgments.”

     

    “I’m very steadfast and stoic… I won’t let anyone down. I’m very loyal.”

     

    Being rather wishy-washy: “The most important thing is that the sun will come up tomorrow and the day will move on.”

     

    Of food, family and dining: “As long as it is hot, wet and goes down the right way, it’s fine with me.”

     

    “With every smell, I smell food. With every sight, I see food. I can almost hear food. I want to spade the whole lot through my mouth at Mach 2. Basta!”

     

    “We all sit round the table and eat together. Andrew and I believe in total parent unity. We’re best friends.”

     

    On the coronation of King Charles III: “Well I’ve decided the best thing about British around a coronation – although I’ve never been to one – I think we should, I should set up a tea room at the bottom of the drive with bunting and cakes.”

     

    “Never presume, never assume. I don’t know. But I’ll be there at the end of the drive with a cup of tea if I’m not there.”

     

    Of wanting to be a television star: “I would quite like to go on Dancing With The Stars. I would like somebody to teach me to tango. I do know the show and my children would be so proud of me.”

     

    On Americans: “I divorced, went to America, wrote a book, went on Oprah and did 12 years as the longest running spokesperson of Weight Watchers. I looked to America to support me and to help me and I really can’t thank the American people enough for what they gave me and what they did for me.”

     

    Of when she decided she wanted to bag a royal: “I met [Prince Andrew] when I was 12, and I said: ‘I’m going to marry him.’”

     

    Of marriage, divorce and work: “I left my marriage knowing I’d have to work. I have.”

     

    “I didn’t want a divorce, but had to because of circumstance.”

     

    “I wish we’d never got divorced. He and I both wish we’d never divorced, but we did. I wish I could go back and be the bride again, but I can’t.”

     

    Of her many, many mistakes: “I felt that I ostracised myself by my behaviour, by the past, by living with all the regrets of my mistakes, that I sort of wore a hair shirt and beat myself up most of the day thinking and regretting why did I make such a mistake. Why have I made so many mistakes?”

     

    “You look at the devil in the face, which you do. Then you forgive, and you say: ‘OK, I’ve made almost a mistake that will never be forgotten,’ and forgive.”

     

    “I think the obstacles are the way, as opposed to in the way. I feel very strongly that I completely and utterly own my very naïve self and made endless different wrong decisions, whatever they may be, but in the end, it’s got me to today as an author. I’m a person in my own right, I’m Sarah.”

     

    “I was so out of control with desperation… I was looking for quick fixes in the places I wouldn’t normally look… I’ve been a huge overtrusting, idiotic, stupid woman that went to look for the perfect situation, and that’s all I can say really.”

     

    “I’ve done the work to get to myself. I’ve done masses of mental therapy. I probably reached to the wrong places and the wrong people and made, as you call it, mistakes. I don’t call them mistakes. I call them enormous learning curves.”

     

  • ‘Comeback King’ Kevin Spacey – Actor Seeks To “Leave The Nonsense Behind”

    ‘Comeback King’ Kevin Spacey – Actor Seeks To “Leave The Nonsense Behind”

    As Kevin Spacey’s eccentric ‘friend’ Geoffrey Mark claims the “exonerated” actor will now “leave the nonsense behind” and begin his comeback, we remind of his friendships with ‘curious sorts’ including Prince Andrew, Jeffrey Epstein, Ghislaine Maxwell and Harvey Weinstein

    A ‘friend’ of Kevin Spacey, Geoffrey Mark, has declared that the Academy Award winning actor and ‘friend’ of the jailed sex offender Ghislaine Maxwell “was always innocent, and just preferred enjoying a bachelor’s lifestyle rather than an abuser’s.”

     

    Asked further about Spacey being “exonerated recently in a London court” at an event for the Hollywood Museum, self-professed “walking encyclopedia of show business history” Mr Mark replied:

     

    “Yeah… It’s very rare, in or out of showbusiness, when someone has a very strong opinion about something, that one is shown to be absolutely correct.”

     

    “I’ve known Kevin for many years. I knew he was innocent. I knew why these charges were being brought. I understood how wrong the whole thing was. We’ve discussed that off camera. I am thrilled to discuss it on camera.”

     

    “Kevin Spacey is one of the most talented human beings on the planet and he needs to get his career back because we’re missing out on all the wonderful, wonderful, wonderful performances that he’s still got left in him.”

     

    “So, let’s leave all this, erm, nonsense behind. Let’s celebrate Kevin Spacey. He’s my buddy. I do.”

     

    “[Kevin’s] a brilliant conversationalist and yes, erm, he does like younger men. Men. Yeah, they’ve been times he’s shown up with a blonde or a brunette on his shoulders, but they were grown folks who were intelligent, brilliant conversationalists.”

     

    “Kevin has given so much to charity that people don’t even know about. That’s the guy I know; this charity loving, charity giving bon vivant, raconteur who is more talented and more attractive than even he realises and I just feel blessed… I just feel blessed. It’s so good to be just a little part of his life.”

     

    “Was it fair the way he was treated? I think yes and no. An allegation is an allegation. I don’t think someone should lose their livelihood over an allegation. On the other hand, all of us who sign contracts have moral clauses in them. Alienating a good part of your audience is a money loser.”

     

    “I think it happened too quickly. I think it happened too much, but I don’t think it is unfair because there are folks out there who are guilty of these things. We can’t just look the other way about paedophilia. We can’t just say: ‘Kevin wasn’t guilty, so therefore nobody else is’ as no, unfortunately, a lot of people are. Just not him and sometimes we have to air on the side of children and say, well, erm, ‘I take it on the chin because you gotta [sic] keep the kids’ welfare the most important thing.”

     

    “I think if the scandal were about anything else, I would say he was terribly and unfairly treated. Only because the subject was children, you’ve got a take a stab and say: ‘This is unfair, but in a way it’s understandable’ and I am thrilled that he has been exonerated. That’s fair.”

     

    Turning to “what’s next for Spacey,” the decidedly eccentric Grammy Award nominee Mr Mark warbled on and opined:

     

    “I think it’s all going to all be about the money. If Kevin comes up with something that looks like it’s going to make studios money, they’re going to forgive him and if Kevin can’t come up with that, then they’re going to use these false accusations as an excuse.”

     

    “So, it all depends on what he comes up with next and what happens in this country politically because unfortunately even outrage like this comes and goes in fads and we’ll have to see who really screws up to get headlines to see how much forgiveness Kevin gets.”

     

    “I’m sure he is asking himself exactly that. ‘What is next? What will people accept from me?’ He lost so much, he’s going to have to rebuild.”

     

    “Even though it was never his fault, he should never have had to go through this. He’s going to have to rebuild and in doing so, my opinion is he’s going to go in a direction we hadn’t considered before. He’s going to do something new and creative because that’s who Kevin is and we’re gonna [sic] see a whole new creative side to him come out. And I’m gonna [sic] say that of course and most folks are gonna [sic] say: ‘Wow, I never knew.’ There’s a lot more coming; there’s a lot more coming and I’m thrilled to see it.”

     

    Spacey was exonerated of nine sexual offence charges relating to four men between 2001 and 2013 by a jury at Southwark Crown Court in July. A claim by Star Trek actor Anthony Rapp that he was sexual assaulted by the former House of Cards star when Rapp was only 14 was also previously dismissed whilst allegations concerning 15 other individuals have continued to “tarnish” his reputation.

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples and watch his current nightly show on YouTube at 9pm daily.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers.

     

    If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Pictured top – Kevin Spacey at Buckingham Palace with convicted sex offending mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell in 2001. The pair were guests of he who paid £12 million to a woman he claimed never to met, Prince Andrew.

     

    Geoffrey Mark
    Whilst leaping to the defence of his chum Kevin Spacey, Geoffrey Mark (pictured) conveniently forgot to mention the actor’s involvement with disgraced individuals including Prince Andrew, Bill Clinton, Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell.
    Peter Mandelson Jeffrey Epstein Kevin Spacey
    Friendships most curious definitely abound for the South Orange, New Jersey born 63-year-old actor Kevin Spacey. Amongst them Peter Mandelson – a most curious sidekick of his fellow mucker, the since deservedly croaked ‘Paedo Island’ owning Jeffrey Epstein.
    Kevin Spacey Elton John Naomi Campbell Bill Clinton
    From Presidents… With alleged, erm, guilty of, erm, many things President Bill Clinton and with the temper tantrum prone model Naomi Campbell and the temper tantrum prone crooner Sir Elton John.
    Kevin-Spacey-Prince-Andrew
    To Princes… With alleged sex pest Prince Andrew.
    Kevin-Spacey-Tony-Blair
    To Prime Ministers… With alleged war criminal Sir Tony Blair.
    Kevin Spacey Harvey Weinstein
    To paedophiles… With convicted sex offender Harvey Weinstein.
  • Poundland Pinching Pest Out – Sex Pest Chris Pincher Resigns As An MP

    Poundland Pinching Pest Out – Sex Pest Chris Pincher Resigns As An MP

    As the grubby groper Chris Pincher resigns as an MP, this sex pest bizarrely pens a crass column in which he laments times passed when “life was to be lived and not loathed”

    A ‘Poundland sex fiend’ best known for “arse squeezing” at the tony Carlton Club in London’s ritzy St James’s has finally done the decent thing and resigned.

     

    The Right Honourable Chris Pincher, the 53-year-old now former Member of Parliament for Tamworth, groped two men in the private members’ club on the night of 21st June 2022.

     

    Parliament’s Independent Expert Panel subsequently found that the associate of Boris Johnson and former minister exhibited behaviour that “was completely inappropriate, profoundly damaging to the individuals concerned, and represented an abuse of power.” They added that he had “touched [one of] his victim’s bottom before moving his hand to touch and squeeze the witness’s testicles, which lasted for a few seconds.”

     

    Formally announcing his resignation today and triggering a by-election in the process, the disgraced Tory stated:

     

    “I have said already that I will not stand at the next general election. However, following the Independent Expert Panel’s decision I wanted to talk to my office team and family.”

     

    “I do not want my constituents to be put to further uncertainty, and so in consequence I have made arrangements to resign and leave the Commons.”

     

    Concluding in typically cowardy custard fashion, Pincher concluded:

     

    “Tamworth is a wonderful place and it has been an honour to represent its people. I shall make no further comment at this time.”

     

    Shockingly and in spite of the scandal surrounding him, in the August-September issue of The Critic magazine, Pincher has been given space to share his views. In an article about Alvis cars, the ‘trouser department sex pest’ shared his view that “owning an Alvis has never been for tight wallets or shallow pockets” and then whined:

     

    “They are beautiful cars, redolent of an age when motoring meant adventure, freedom and fun, long before we all began to fret about the future and flog our friends and ourselves for daring to show some spirit and enjoy the day. It was a better time when life was to be lived not loathed. Boris Johnson would suit an Alvis.”

     

    It is unknown if Pincher remains a member of the Carlton Club or if he actually himself owns an Alvis, but what is most definitely for sure is that this grubby groper will go down in history as one of the key reasons for the fall of Boris Johnson as Prime Minister.

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples and watch his current nightly show on YouTube at 9pm daily.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers.

     

    If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Chris Pincher Twitter
    Christopher Pincher has now revised his Twitter account and states himself to be “formerly” the Member of Parliament for Tamworth. He’ll simply now go down in history as nothing but another filthy Tory scumbag.

    Other Tory twerps who’ll go down in history as ‘Sex Pests’ (at the very least)…

    Neil-Parish-tractor-porn
    Now ex-MP Neil Parish will forever just be remembered at for watching ‘tractor porn’ whilst sitting in the Chamber of the House of Commons. This creepy farmer turned Tory will go down in history as a grubby, skid-mark on parliamentary history. Mr Parish laughably claimed later that what he had done was “very immoral” but not illegal; he argued that he’d actually been looking at Class Dominator tractors, a brand of combine harvesters.
    Sally-Bercow
    Another person who thought she could make the House of Commons a “sexual area” was Sally Bercow, the wife of the now former Speaker, John Bercow. She is pictured here in their home within the Palace of Westminster clad in nothing but a sheet. That she went on to have an affair with her own husband’s cousin, Alan Bercow, about says all that needs to be said.
    David-Warburton
    In April 2022, the Conservative MP for Somerton and Frome, David Warburton, was accused of sexually harassing three women. He was subsequently admitted to a psychiatric hospital, pictured in a photograph with lines of what looked like cocaine and was also revealed to have taken a loan of £150,000 from a Russian businessman through a Seychelles company without declaring it. This member of Mensa was subsequently suspended from the Tories awaiting the outcome of an Independent Complaints and Grievance Scheme (ICGS) investigation into allegations of harassment and drug abuse.
    Rob-Roberts
    Another decidedly dodgy MP still in the House of Commons is Rob Roberts. The Member for Delyn “acted inappropriately after he sought to engage in a relationship with a male member of his staff,” according to a report in May 2021. This former “financial planner” was elected as a Conservative, but still shockingly sits as an independent to this day, but has now “separated” from his wife Alexandra Roberts supposedly.
    Imran-Ahmad-Khan
    In April 2022, Tory MP Imran Ahmad Khan was jailed for groping a 15-year-old boy in 2008. He was expelled from the Conservative Party and resigned as an MP. He subsequently appealed, but failed to convince anyone that he was anything but a nonce in December 2022.
    Charles-Elphicke-Natalie-Elphicke-Naughty-Tory-sex-offender
    The ultimate examples in Tory sex pest scum are Charlie Elphicke – a now convicted, ex-MP and sex offender – and his wicked, immigrant hating scumbag wife, Natalie Elphicke. That the Conservatives gave this woman her criminal husband’s seat to make her own speaks volumes as to how the once great political party of Margaret Thatcher feels about making monsters pay for sex crimes.
  • The Jim & Dan Show Up – Toerags Dan Wootton & Jim Davidson

    The Jim & Dan Show Up – Toerags Dan Wootton & Jim Davidson

    In allowing Jim Davidson and Dan Wootton to show up together, all GB News achieves is to prove that their joke of a channel is beyond the pale

    Jim Davidson is rat-like-rogue who has ‘nice’ things to say about the paedophile Gary Glitter; Dan Wootton is a rat-like-rotter who has ‘nasty’ things to say about lovely old ladies like Susan Boyle.

     

    Surprise, surprise (with no Cilla Black bonus) to hear that the two spent part of yesterday uniting to chat on GB News last night. Whilst the sentiment of criticising Just Stop Oil is something most sane folk can agree with, the fact that this supposed attempt a news channel thought it appropriate to bring these two together was beyond the pale.

     

    If GB News wishes to be taken seriously as a news force, it should certainly take Dan Wootton off air until the investigation into his alleged activities is complete. Equally, if GB News wants to prove it doesn’t associate with 1980s style bigotry, it’d have never have put Jim Davidson on the air in the first place. It is time that these two grimmer than Darren Grimes even grotbags were simply told “don’t bother to show up again.”

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers.

     

    If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Dan-Wootton-Jim-Davidson
    GB News is about the only channel that will now accept the weird warblings of these two utter berks.
    Jim Davidson Gary Glitter
    In June 2021, foul-mouthed ‘5×3’ (five kids by three of his five wives) Jim Davidson said of the still jailed child abuser Gary Glitter: “I spoke to Paul [Gadd, AKA ‘Gary Glitter’] when I visited The Verne [prison] two years. He’s remorseful and he looked ready to start a new life.” That this loathsome individual thought it appropriate to share such sentiments speaks volumes as to where his most definitely lacking moral compass is directly.
    Dan Wootton Susan Boyle
    Dan Wootton – currently under investigation by amongst others News UK – once said of Susan Boyle: “Volatile… Forced to shop Tesco and travel by bus.” He has also been known to have a pop at David and Victoria Beckham and Johnny Depp amongst many others.

    Deserved “public hate figure” Jim Davidson OBE’s worst moments…

    On Great Yarmouth:

    “Full of fat children of all colours.”

     

    On London and the UK:

    “I am never coming to London again… I may as well go to Dubai and be an ethnic minority there than wait five years till I become one here.”

     

    On former UKIP leader Nigel Farage:

    “The Jim Davidson of the political world.”

     

    On beating up one of his four ex-wives:

    “We’re like a couple of boxers. On the first occasion, I poked her in the eye by accident. I actually went for the mouth… The second time I gave her a shiner. I threw a bunch of keys which whacked her in the eye. Just for a giggle she kept blackening it up to make it look worse.”

     

    “I took the wife out last night; one punch!”

     

    On supposedly giving up on making jokes about black people:

    “I can’t do impressions of Frank Bruno or Ian Wright? That’s racist, is it? But I can do Sven-Göran Eriksson?”

     

    “I’m not going to get on my knee, and I’m not going to go ever black person I see, ‘hail you.’ I’m not going to apologise for the past; the past was the past.”

     

    On Black Lives Matter protestors:

    “Pondlife… F**king stupid.”

     

    Of his thoughts about his chum Boris Johnson:

    “Don’t listen with mother.”

     

    On Piers Morgan (after he was paid to appear on his Life Stories programme):

    “You don’t deserve to listen to anyone’s life story because you don’t f**king listen.”

     

    On the BBC and the NHS:

    I was a smell under peoples’ noses… I’m totally erased; I am the statue that’s thrown into Bristol Docks… They gave me a million quid to go away.”

     

    I hate the BBC with a passion. It’s a toss-up between them and the NHS who I hate the most.”

     

    Proving himself the ultimate ‘Brain of Britain’:

    “People who do stupid things with hazardous materials often die.”

     

    After being declared bankrupt:

    “My problem is money.”

     

    On himself:

    “I could cure Aids and give £1 billion to womens’ groups and people would still think I was a racist, sexist twat”.

     

    “I’m a homophobic arsehole.”

     

    Delusional and deservedly disliked Dan Wootton’s worst moments…

    On Dominic Cummings (who’d probably have preferred even Katie Hopkins as a defender):

    “Make no mistake, the establishment is out to get Dominic Cummings… I despair.”

     

    On footballer David Beckham and his singer turned fashion designer wife Victoria (whose fans responded with fury):

    “Weird and creepy.”

     

    On singer George Shelley (whose unsurprisingly fans got equally upset)

    “[He’s] done a Tom Daley and come out as bisexual.”

     

    On singer Susan Boyle (whose management hit back with a denial):

    “Volatile… Forced to shop Tesco and travel by bus.”

     

    On political activist and Novara Media editor Ash Sarkar (before he “shut her down” during a “fiery conversation”):

    “Grasping.”

     

    On Celebrity Masterchef winner Emma Kennedy (who reported him to Ofcom and threated to sue him with the help of Carter Ruck):

    “Deranged Boris hater.”

     

    On actor Johnny Depp (who sued him for defamation):

    “Wife beater.”

     

  • Poundland Pinching Pincher – “Arse Squeezing” Tory Terror Chris Pincher MP Must Be Punched Out

    Poundland Pinching Pincher – “Arse Squeezing” Tory Terror Chris Pincher MP Must Be Punched Out

    Grubby groper Chris Pincher MP must now be thrown out of Parliament unceremoniously; this filthy disgrace should be chucked off the terrace and into the Thames along with the rest of the raging sex pests amongst his creepiest of colleagues

    “Pincher by name and a pincher by nature” and “a pound shop Harvey Weinstein” are just two of the appropriately noxious nicknames attributed by former Conservative colleagues to the slammed as “shocking by any standards” The Right Honourable Chris Pincher MP.

     

    The “full on grope” loving Member of Parliament for Tamworth “brought the House into disrepute” and most worthily was given an eight-week suspension after being condemned by the Standards Committee for doing “significant” damage to public life. The now former Prime Minister Boris Johnson had first been made aware of “alleged misconduct” about Pincher in 2017, yet chose to completely ignore this in the subsequent five years and in subsequent Cabinet level appointments.

     

    Referencing 53-year-old, Walsall born Pincher’s filthy antics at the once tony Carlton Club in London on 29th June 2022 – which included what one victim referenced as “squeezing [his] arse” and “kind of grabbing where [his] testicles [were]” and “squeezing” – the Commissioner raged:

     

    “[It is a matter] of fact [that] Mr Pincher groped two individuals.”

     

    “Mr Pincher touched the first individual (the complainant) on his arm and neck, before groping his bottom. Mr Pincher groped the second person on his bottom and then groped his testicles (Witness 3).”

     

    “The damage that has been caused to the reputation and integrity of the House and its Members cannot be described as trivial, unnoteworthy, or not important to address.”

     

    “The damage is significant. It involves behaviour that by any standards was shocking, deeply inappropriate, and adversely impacted two unsuspecting individuals who had no expectation that they would be subjected to such behaviour.”

     

    “Further, it was conduct that risks advancing a misplaced public perception that Members of Parliament do not have to abide by normal standards of behaviour and can commit acts of misconduct with impunity.”

     

    Given that any suspension over 10 days is likely to generate a recall petition, this morning Sky News’s Tamara Cohen suggested:

     

    “I think a by-election is very likely [in Tamworth]… This could be a fifth one for Rishi Sunak.”

     

    It is unknown as to whether Mr Pincher remains a member of the Carlton Club or whether he was expelled, but equally it should now be enquired as to if, and if not why, the Metropolitan Police have taken actions against him. Given creepy actor Kevin Spacey’s current trial involves similar allegations, if they don’t, this sordid saga could pile further disgrace on the police formerly headed by Dame Cressida Dick.

     

    Elsewhere on social media, The Steeple Times’s Matthew Steeples conducted a poll (see below) and added:

     

    “Given there are over 50 individual cases of MPs accused of sexual misconduct out of the 650 MPs currently in the House of Commons, if this mucky matter isn’t dealt with at a higher level, public confidence in Parliament will fall only further. How on earth can the public trust Members of Parliament to represent us, when so many of them cannot help but keep their filthy hands off members of that very same public?”

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples.

     

    Pictured top – The bottom and testicle pinching MP with the man whose career he helped end, the former Prime Minister and father-of-children-number-of-unknown Boris Johnson.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers.

     

    If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    This morning on Twitter, Matthew Steeples asked: “Is alleged bottom pincher Chris Pincher MP going to pay the price of his alleged bottom pinching by losing his currently Conservatives held seat?” By 11:30am on Thursday 6th July 2023, the majority of respondents favoured the answers: “Yes; definitely deserved” and “Yes; and put him in the stocks.”

    Other Tory twerps who’ll go down in history as ‘Sex Pests’ (at the very least)…

    Neil-Parish-tractor-porn
    Now ex-MP Neil Parish will forever just be remembered at for watching ‘tractor porn’ whilst sitting in the Chamber of the House of Commons. This creepy farmer turned Tory will go down in history as a grubby, skid-mark on parliamentary history. Mr Parish laughably claimed later that what he had done was “very immoral” but not illegal; he argued that he’d actually been looking at Class Dominator tractors, a brand of combine harvesters.
    Sally-Bercow
    Another person who thought she could make the House of Commons a “sexual area” was Sally Bercow, the wife of the now former Speaker, John Bercow. She is pictured here in their home within the Palace of Westminster clad in nothing but a sheet. That she went on to have an affair with her own husband’s cousin, Alan Bercow, about says all that needs to be said.
    David-Warburton
    In April 2022, the Conservative MP for Somerton and Frome, David Warburton, was accused of sexually harassing three women. He was subsequently admitted to a psychiatric hospital, pictured in a photograph with lines of what looked like cocaine and was also revealed to have taken a loan of £150,000 from a Russian businessman through a Seychelles company without declaring it. This member of Mensa was subsequently suspended from the Tories awaiting the outcome of an Independent Complaints and Grievance Scheme (ICGS) investigation into allegations of harassment and drug abuse.
    Rob-Roberts
    Another decidedly dodgy MP still in the House of Commons is Rob Roberts. The Member for Delyn “acted inappropriately after he sought to engage in a relationship with a male member of his staff,” according to a report in May 2021. This former “financial planner” was elected as a Conservative, but still shockingly sits as an independent to this day, but has now “separated” from his wife Alexandra Roberts supposedly.
    Imran-Ahmad-Khan
    In April 2022, Tory MP Imran Ahmad Khan was jailed for groping a 15-year-old boy in 2008. He was expelled from the Conservative Party and resigned as an MP. He subsequently appealed, but failed to convince anyone that he was anything but a nonce in December 2022.
    Charles-Elphicke-Natalie-Elphicke-Naughty-Tory-sex-offender
    The ultimate examples in Tory sex pest scum are Charlie Elphicke – a now convicted, ex-MP and sex offender – and his wicked, immigrant hating scumbag wife, Natalie Elphicke. That the Conservatives gave this woman her criminal husband’s seat to make her own speaks volumes as to how the once great political party of Margaret Thatcher feels about making monsters pay for sex crimes.
  • Dirty Deviant Daphne Does It Again… Daphne Barak Stoops To New Low

    Dirty Deviant Daphne Does It Again… Daphne Barak Stoops To New Low

    As dirty deviant Daphne Barak peddles stories about Fergie’s cancer battle, Matthew Steeples reminds that this toady turd-like twaddler should simply be silenced

    Nobody in their right mind would ever wish ill-health on anyone other than perhaps Hitler or Stalin, but though I join with all wishing Sarah, Duchess of York a full and fast recovery from cancer, I today have to call out her pugnacious ‘pal’ Daphne Barak for raking over the story of her mastectomy.

     

    Ms Barak – whom it must be noted is a ‘mate’ also of sexually sordid sorts including Bill Clinton, Ghislaine Maxwell and Donald Trump – is clearly one of those women who flocks to grime in the way that flies flock to cow dung.

     

    Today, the cousin of a former Prime Minister of Israel who enjoyed hanging out with the Ponzi scheming paedophile Jeffrey Epstein shared her latest tittle-tattle in both The Sun on Sunday and The Mail on Sunday. In doing so illustrated her inability to be impartial in her reporting and provided yet further proof that she is nothing but a shoveler of spurious spam and someone whose stories should be taken with a pinch of salt.

     

    For the Mail, bumbling berk Barak salivated: “When my dear friend Sarah Ferguson found out she had cancer, she broke the news in her typical, irrepressible style.” The garbling ghoul – clearly illustrating not an ounce of sympathy for the victims of a bunch of privileged paedophiles – then crassly crowed: “I was sure it was in no small part due to the stress Sarah has endured from all the ‘nonsense’ as we often referred to it – that is to say supported her ex-husband Prince Andrew over being forced to quit his official Royal duties over his friendship with paedophile Jeffrey Epstein.”

     

    In The Sun, pretending to be ‘Little Miss Generous,’ this driveling douchebag attempted to persuade readers of how kind hearted she truly is. The cretinous creep crowed: “I sent her a bouquet of purple flowers, her favourite colour.” Perhaps, if genuinely a decent person, the shameless scrapbag Daphne Barak might do something else; donate her hefty fees from The Sun on Sunday and The Mail on Sunday to a cancer charity.

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers.

     

    If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Questions for Daphne Barak

    In October 2022, we asked a number of questions of Daphne Barak after she published prison ‘interviews’ with her chum Ghislaine Maxwell. She failed to answer them then, so we again ask them now:

     

    • Why did the American authorities allow a prisoner to give such interviews so soon after her conviction?
    • Did the authorities not consider the impact such interviews would have on the victims of this convicted sex trafficking nonce and grubby groping abuser?
    • What is the agenda of Daphne Barak and what involvement did Kevin Maxwell and his siblings have in setting up these interviews?
    • Did PR peddlers for the mucky madam – such as Brian Basham, Jay Beecher and Ross Gow – have any involvement in the bringing about of these interviews?
    • Why did this so-called ‘journalist’ not ask anything about what this mucky madam feels about the impact of her actions on her many victims?
    • Why did this so-called ‘journalist’ not ask anything about this mucky madam’s secret marriage to Scott Borgerson in 2015?
    • Why did this so-called ‘journalist’ not ask why Ghislaine Maxwell – someone she’s associated with for at least 30 years – hasn’t paid off her debts to her lawyers?